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My Ovaries Just Shriveled Up and Died

Why do these damn baby covers persist on torturing me? It’s a goddamn baby in a saggy diaper, for Fuck’s sake! There isn’t even a shirtless bohunk himbo to ease the pain a bit this time. Not that the shirtless bohunk himbo ever really eases the pain, but it helps remind me that what I’m reading is, in fact, a romance novel and not a guide on “how to leave sharp pointy things laying around on the floor so that your infant baby trips and impales himself on it” (thanks Robyn!). Where are his parents, anyway? Shouldn’t they be sucking each other’s tonsils in the background or something? Have I mentioned how much I hate baby covers?

Thanks for the nightmare, Amber!

This entry was posted on Wednesday, November 30th, 2005 at 9:05 pm and is filed under Covers. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.

8 Responses to “My Ovaries Just Shriveled Up and Died”

  1. Robyn
    Posted: Nov 30th, 2005 at 9:23 pm
    1

    That’s dangerous! Everyone knows you don’t put a baby who’s barely walking next to a sharp, pointy object! What’s next, dangling him off a balcony? Having him help with crocodile feeding time?

  2. Darla
    Posted: Dec 1st, 2005 at 5:24 am
    2

    Oh, wow–royal baby romance. There’s just not enough of this in the world.

    I’m picturing a whole castle inhabited by babies, with little baby spies sneaking around and little baby servants waiting on the royal babies and….

    I need some sleep.

  3. Anhoni Patel
    Posted: Dec 1st, 2005 at 9:07 am
    3

    BAM, are you trying to kill us?

  4. SpikeDru
    Posted: Dec 1st, 2005 at 1:26 pm
    4

    WTF is that on its arse?

  5. Angelique
    Posted: Dec 1st, 2005 at 11:47 pm
    5

    There is something sad about a book using a baby’s ass to sell a book. I bet who ever signed of on that cover just lost their job.

  6. Anonymous
    Posted: Dec 2nd, 2005 at 5:27 am
    6

    I’m with you on the romances with babies on the covers. How is that supposed to turn me on? I work as a cataloger in a public library where we take any romances we get in donations as our director thinks they are trash and won’t order any (nevermind that they circulate more than any other genre) and someone gave us two boxes full of romance novels. I was excited until I opened them up and every single one had babies on the covers. I need to find some Harlequin Blaze or something to balance it out.

  7. Luckeecharm
    Posted: Dec 3rd, 2005 at 10:18 pm
    7

    Is this what women really dream about? Having a baby with some random, prince, millionarie, doctor, cop, military man? Sure I would like to have a couple babies in my future, but it just seems like over half of all of these books include a baby in the storyline.

    Amber

  8. SpikeDru
    Posted: Dec 4th, 2005 at 2:34 am
    8

    anon - I get hold of the covers from charity shops here in the UK and it’s really obvious you get donated collections of M&B in which the reader really loved the medical romances, or the “fake/broken marriage turns out to be True Love” or, well, the gorram babies. And when I’m looking through an entire box of baby romances, I start to wonder how there can even be that many baby romance plots.

    At least adding in the sharp pointy crown for the brat to land on gives this one some spice.

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