18 Responses to “What Do You Think is In the Box?”

1. Jaimi Posted: Oct 9th, 2006 at 10:28 am

   1 Hahaha! Whenever I hear that song I think of the homoerotic cuddle scene in Without a Paddle.

2. Evangeline Anderson Posted: Oct 9th, 2006 at 11:17 am

   2 oh, I loved that stupid movie just for the silly homo vibe. I’ll take it any way i can get it. Going to netflix it right now. PS I agree about the smirk on the blond’s face. But there’s something about the set of the man’s mouth that suggests maybe he’s used to her abuse and maybe he even likes it. “What’s in the box, honey?” “Why don’t you open it and find out,sweetheart. Oh, and then bend over and crack a smile.” “Aw, honey, ever since you got that ‘Bend Over, Boyfriend’ DVD you’ve turned into a mean abusive bitch. And sometimes what you do to me hurts–a lot!” “You know you love it, bitch. Now bend over. Or do I have to get the riding crop?”

3. Devon Posted: Oct 9th, 2006 at 11:58 am

   3 There is something really annoying about her. Something with the expression and the angle of her head. She’s too gleeful to be opening his gift. And he looks annoyed, like, “Bitch, can’t you leave my shit alone?”

4. fiveandfour Posted: Oct 9th, 2006 at 12:21 pm

   4 I think my problem with the woman - besides the facts that a) it’s not me and b) the p0rn hair and c) the jealously possessive yet I-got-one-over-on-you-buddy expression - is that the angle of her face is too reminiscent of Keira Knightley and her Jaw of Doom. Beware the Jaw for it is both Frightening and Everywhere.

5. FerfeLaBat Posted: Oct 9th, 2006 at 1:26 pm

   5 Oy. Just bought Strange Candy and I hate myself. When’s the review??

6. Jackie Posted: Oct 9th, 2006 at 1:53 pm

   6 It’s her peeking up and over his shoulder as if she could see his face as she’s opening the box for him. Yanno, if she REALLY wanted to see his face, she shouldn’t be doing the behind-the-back wraparound thing: FACE HIM. Hell, sit on his lap. That way, he wouldn’t have his elbows bent at a weird angle, she could see his expression, and all is goodness. Unless there’s something that’s going to explode when she opens the box, and she doesn’t want to be covered in the stuff. Yeah, that’s it. She’s TOTALLY using him as a living shield. Evil, man. She’s evil. Must be a side effect from the hair…

7. December Quinn Posted: Oct 9th, 2006 at 2:13 pm

   7 Ugh. His jaw and lips remind me of Freddy Mercury, and that ain’t a good thing. And I second the horrible Knightley jaw of doom. Yech. Cool cover with icky models.

8. Bam Posted: Oct 9th, 2006 at 3:05 pm

   8 His jaw and lips remind me of Freddy Mercury, and that ain’t a good thing. Good call on Freddy Mercury. Man, I loved that guy. I was distraught when my mother told me that he didn’t like girls. She said, “Well, why do you think they call themselves ‘Queen’?” I was about… seven, I think. I think homeboy on the cover looks like Antonio Sabato Jr.

9. shuzluva Posted: Oct 9th, 2006 at 3:43 pm

   9 I think homeboy on the cover looks like Antonio Sabato Jr. Bam, I think you’re projecting. I remember the days when Antonio Sabato Jr. was HOT. I think you’re looking for hotness where it doesn’t exist as a way to hide your sick, sad BR crush. It’s okay, Bam, we understand your stalkeresque crush. You’ll survive.

10. L.E. Bryce Posted: Oct 9th, 2006 at 4:10 pm

    10 OMG! Homeboy is totally dating Morgan Fairchild! No wonder she looks so smug.

11. Evangeline Anderson Posted: Oct 9th, 2006 at 5:51 pm

    11 I also hate Kiera Knightly. I’ve hated her since that horrible ‘updated’ version of Pride and Prejudice that came out. Ugh! She’s a grinning, grinding, gurning skeleton.

12. Bam Posted: Oct 9th, 2006 at 6:11 pm

    12 Keira Knightley has a stupid face. I hate her. Antonio Sabato Jr. was hot as Jagger in General Hospital a thousand years ago. And none of you understand my sick, sad, stalkeresque crush. NOT ONE OF YOU!! Bitches.

13. Evangeline Anderson Posted: Oct 9th, 2006 at 7:26 pm

    13 I felt this way about Vin Diesel once. Before The Pacifier. I get it.

14. LSB Author, Darragha Foster Posted: Oct 9th, 2006 at 8:27 pm

    14 1) Her POSITVE pregnancy test strip; 2) The haunted dildo (oh…the box might be too small) from my new release; 3) A penile version of an iron maiden; 4) Silt-flavored body gel; 5) A picture of his mother nekkid in a tub of green Jell-O with his Uncle Charlie 6) All the fat that chick had lipo’d off her ass; 7) Her boob implants after removel due to toxic leakage; 8) A mirror and a card that says, “Who’s a Daddy?”

15. Barbara B. Posted: Oct 10th, 2006 at 5:30 am

    15 Evangeline, if only you could write the book from the scene you described in your first post. Unfortunately I know that’s not your thang but that was some HOT shit! It was quite…stirring! There just aren’t enough strap-on erotic romances to suit a woman of my, what should I call them? Proclivities. Yeah, proclivities.

16. Joanne Posted: Oct 10th, 2006 at 5:23 pm

    16 “And none of you understand my sick, sad, stalkeresque crush. NOT ONE OF YOU!! Bitches.” I do.

17. Evangeline Anderson Posted: Oct 10th, 2006 at 6:05 pm

    17 lol, Bam–I’ve told you over and over that fem-dom doesn’t sell. But have you ever read a book by Anne Rice writing as Anne Rampling called Exit to Eden? They made a horrible ‘comedy’ out of it starring of all people Dan Akroid and Rosie O’Donnel (ugh!) but the actual book was really good. And there was a really hot scene in the book where the heroine of the book who is supposed to be ‘training’ the hero, uses a strap on on him and demands that he submit to her while she penetrates him. Whoo–it’s about the only fem-dom novel I’ve ever read that ever got my motor revving. But I bet you’d like it if you can find it. : ) E

18. SpikeDru Posted: Oct 15th, 2006 at 2:49 pm

    18 I think he’s cut a hole in the box and has inserted his cock into it. So when she opens the box up it pops like a Jack-in-a-box.