Invalid Cowboys are Hot

On this here Friday the 13th, I thought you guys deserved a treat. And that’s exactly what a skinny ass cowboy with a broken arm is. A treat! Dude should have kept his shirt on. Since he’s already wearing a black hat, he might as well have put on a black shirt, too. Would have helped this cover immensely. Notice the complete lack of muscular definition on this guy’s chest. Check out his bony ass chicken wing arms. I thought cowboys got all muscled from roping steers and shit. While I am not a huge fan of overly muscled guys, I like my boys with some muscular definition. This guy just looks like he just woke up from a ten year coma after getting stabbed in the head by a bull’s horns or something. And why does he look so constipated? His face is pinched like he’s just holding in a gigantic smelly fart. Or maybe he had already let it out, which would account for the “smell the fart” scowl on his face. I have the feeling that if you took off his hat, you’d find a bald head under there. He just looks like the kind of guy who’d wear a Stetson to cover male pattern baldness. On the other hand, I really like the font that was used here. It’s very clean-looking. The author also has a cool name. She sounds like a soap opera villain. Awesome.

Thanks to the lovely Sybil for this cover.

This entry was posted on Friday, October 13th, 2006 at 9:00 am and is filed under Covers. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.

10 Responses to “Invalid Cowboys are Hot”

shuzluva
Posted: Oct 13th, 2006 at 9:27 am

Not only does his head look like it was superimposed on a 16-year-old boy’s body, but those nipples… What the fuck is going on there? One is pointed N/S and the other goes E/W, and his left is definitely situated lower than his right. Yes, I know his right arm is bent away from his body and a nipple may move…but ROTATE??

Laura
Posted: Oct 13th, 2006 at 10:29 am

Is he wearing lipstick? Looks like Revlon’s Dusky Pink on those lips; and he’s making the classic amateur mistake of trying to make his lips look bigger by coloring outside the lines. At least he’s not going Goodfellas housewife with some dark lipliner.

Suisan
Posted: Oct 13th, 2006 at 10:55 am

Oh help me! I’m on the floor laughing.

That simply isn’t his head! The sling. The lipstick. The chest. Help! The sling again.

I think I just inhaled a dust bunny while I was rolling around down here. Gack.

Wylie Kinson
Posted: Oct 13th, 2006 at 11:43 am

This is just so sad! My heart goes out to the author who COULDN’T have been happy with this travesty. The ‘artist’ obviously hasn’t read their copy of Photoshop for Dummies.
There is nothing remotely sexy or appealing about this underdeveloped, lipsticked, wonky nippled man. NOTHING!
Let’s all pray to the Cover Gods that this poor author get a better one next time.

PS - Romancing the Blog’s topic today is about covers. Some interesting comments coming through…

December Quinn
Posted: Oct 13th, 2006 at 3:29 pm

He looks like the victim of bad lip-plumping silicone injections. I guess there are some types of cowboys who go in for those, but I don’t think it’s the kind this poor author was writing about…

Kristie (J)
Posted: Oct 13th, 2006 at 4:17 pm
6

Yes! That’s the shade of lipstick I’ve been looking for!
sybil
Posted: Oct 13th, 2006 at 7:26 pm
7

hee

you are most welcome
Barbara B.
Posted: Oct 14th, 2006 at 3:49 am
8

Terrible cowboy cover. Maybe the worst ever.