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Can’t Turn a Ho into a Housewife

You know that old saying,”Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free”? As the title helpfully tells us, the dude in the ten gallon hat has already bagged the Amy Smart looking chick next to him, so why does he have to marry her? In the world of Harlequin, that’s simple. Either a) the dumb ho got pregnant and the man’s unrelenting code of honor compels him to drag the woman down the aisle or b) he is angling for a partnership at the firm where he’s a lawyer and the partners only look at “family men” as potential partners. If you think I’m being cynical, take a closer look at these two and tell me they’re the picture of bliss. Yeah, that’s what I thought, bitches! Step off.

I swear to god, this guy looks like John Corbett and looks eerily like the guy from that book with the Worst. Title. Ever. You know, I think they’re the same guy ’cause they sport the same exact constipated expression at the thought of matrimony. Anyway, you know this wedding is a fancy occassion because he’s wearing his special string tie. Nothing screams “high class” like a string tie, y’all. It’s all the rage at the Austin Fashion Week. I can’t tell if Amy Smart is disgusted with the man himself or if she’s afraid that a creature is hiding under his hat and will launch out and bite her in the neck in the middle of the ceremony. Maybe it’s utter revulsion or morbid fascination, but she’s certainly looking at that hat with suspicion as well. Whatever it is, I love it. Work it, girlfriend.

This entry was posted on Friday, October 20th, 2006 at 9:32 am and is filed under Covers. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.

7 Responses to “Can’t Turn a Ho into a Housewife”

  1. Anonymous
    Posted: Oct 20th, 2006 at 1:34 pm
    1

    Looks more like she is trying to hang on to him. Looks like he’s running away and she latched on to him.

  2. LazuliLong
    Posted: Oct 20th, 2006 at 1:49 pm
    2

    “No! Come back! You’ve only done the bedded part! My contract promised me wedded too!”

  3. fiveandfour
    Posted: Oct 20th, 2006 at 5:08 pm
    3

    I dunno, but I think Bedded then Wed is a real contender for Worst. Title. Ever. It’s just about as insulting as The Bought-and-Paid-For Wife.

    Hmmm…come to think of it, I think it’s not only the guy that’s the same on both of those covers. The body language between the couples is just about the same in both cases.

  4. Devon
    Posted: Oct 20th, 2006 at 7:40 pm
    4

    Wow, they look so…happy. That must’ve been a fun reception. How romantic. She’s all, “I’ve bagged one for good.” He’s all, “Alcohol is the devil.”

    My first thought was “Chris in the Morning.” Looks a lot like Jon Corbett.

  5. Rosie
    Posted: Oct 21st, 2006 at 12:11 am
    5

    I just saw this book today at the UBS and commented to the owner that Bam would have a field day with that book title…it frickin’ freaky to see it here!

  6. Joanne
    Posted: Oct 22nd, 2006 at 5:56 pm
    6

    I love the song “Can’t Make A Ho a Housewife” (dunno why, it’s just fun to sing along to)! Props to you for working it into a post, lol.

  7. Isabella Snow
    Posted: Oct 23rd, 2006 at 2:53 pm
    7

    Whoa, what a title.

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