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What Ever Happened to Natalie Imbruglia

Hey, you guys, remember that “Torn” chick? Like when that song first came out, everyone was singing, I’m all out of faith, this is how I feel… I’m cold and I am shamed lying naked on the floor but then the radio stations wouldn’t stop playing it and every time you heard it, it made you want to jam an ice pick into your eardrums? And remember the music video where she had that cute pixie haircut and she’s all dancing around in a cute little hoodie while her boyfriend was moving out? Man, I had a big ole lesbo crush on her back then. Anyway, what I meant to say from the very beginning is that the chick on this cover looks a lot like the “Torn” chick, but also like that chick from the O.C. Man, look at her skin. So pretty, so flawless… I wanna bite her cheek. She’s got an ethereal loveliness that Tim Burton would positively kill for. And oh, that button nose. This girl is adorable. But what the hell is that thing behind her? Seriously, it looks like a fucked-up inflatable love doll or something. Dude ought to sue his plastic surgeon ’cause I think he done messed up his pec implants. Honestly, I think he forgot to put the other one in. And did the mad doctor also remove his other shoulder while he was under? What would be the purpose of that? Madness, I tell you! Or maybe he’s in the process of transforming into a blob-like thing and he’s about to eat the “Torn” chick. Noooooo! Leave her alone, you bastard! Poor “Torn” chick. I don’t think she even knows what’s going on behind her. She’s probably too busy thinking up lyrics to convey her emo gloominess.

This entry was posted on Tuesday, November 21st, 2006 at 10:20 am and is filed under Covers. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.

9 Responses to “What Ever Happened to Natalie Imbruglia”

  1. darragha
    Posted: Nov 21st, 2006 at 10:52 am
    1

    The woman on the cover reminds me of Geena Davis.

  2. shuzluva
    Posted: Nov 21st, 2006 at 11:34 am
    2

    I agree with Darragha. Although I should say I’m seeing Helena Bonham Carter mixed with Geena Davis - and it’s all because of your Tim Burton reference. I’m not seeing Nathalie Imbruglia. She was much more pixie-like. This chick is all windblown and sexy and about to be eaten by a blob. So then she’ll be the corpse bride and we’ll have full circle.

    Sorry, it’s been a long day!

  3. Robyn
    Posted: Nov 21st, 2006 at 12:12 pm
    3

    Natalie Imbruglia had MUCH bigger lips. Honest, you couldn’t quit staring at them because you were so worried they were going to explode.

  4. Jackie
    Posted: Nov 21st, 2006 at 1:29 pm
    4

    ::BWAHAHAHAHAHA::

    ((wipes tear from eye))

    It was the eating the Torn chick comment that did me in…but I think she’s got a Natalie Portman thing going on…

  5. Kimber
    Posted: Nov 21st, 2006 at 2:06 pm
    5

    I’ll see your Geena Davis and raise you a Tori Amos.

  6. Kristie(J)
    Posted: Nov 21st, 2006 at 6:25 pm
    6

    I see Geena too! A much younger Geena. Like maybe the Geena who did Brad Pitt.

  7. kate r
    Posted: Nov 22nd, 2006 at 5:13 am
    7

    Oh, THAT song. okay, here’s the best interpretation ever the mime thing.

    He almost makes you forgive all previous mimes.

  8. Tiff
    Posted: Nov 22nd, 2006 at 12:45 pm
    8

    2 Cups of Anna Paquin + 1 cup of Tori Amos = that girl

  9. Isabella Snow
    Posted: Nov 24th, 2006 at 6:43 pm
    9

    I agree, Geena!

    Natalie Imbruglia (b*tch dated MY Robbie Williams!) is on Euro MTV quite a bit still. She has long hair and got her tits done. She looks pretty good, actually. And that guy from that video, the tall blonde, he does some commercials from time to time and he is still hot. Very sexy English accent. Yumm.

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