Grade: B+

Man, I’ve been reading a bunch of Laura Kinsale historical romances lately that I’ve completely forgotten how fun a “fluffy” historical could be. I picked up this book ’cause I wanted to just lay down for a couple of hours and read something —-anything, really—- and found my self totally engrossed with this thing. In fact, I devoured it in three and a half hours. I know this because I picked it up at 8:30 and was finished with it by midnight. It’s hot, clever, smart, and the two romantic leads are just to-die-for! It reminded me of the early Julia Quinn books —-you know, before she got stuck in her Bridgerton funk—- and I just wanted to keep reading about these delightful people. The prose is clean, the characters are reasonable people who actually sit down and talk, the dialogue comes fast and clever, and the sex is delicious. Sure, there were a couple of things I had a problem with —-like what the hell does it have to do with the fairytale, The Raven Prince—- and other nitpicky things, but on the whole, this debut book was a blast and I can’t wait to read the sequels. Squeee!

The Plot: Anna Wren is a poor widow living in a tiny nowheresville village in Georgian England. She was married for six years to a lying, cheating jerkweed of a man who strayed because Anna couldn’t have children and thus, is not a real womyn. The jerkweed husband left Anna a little bit of money, but not enough to take care of a little cottage, her kind mother-in-law, and a little absent-minded maid they had taken in when the girl was 10 years old. As Anna is coming from the market carrying a basket of eggs and kippers, she is practically run down by an arrogant, hot-tempered man who falls off his horse. Anna dismisses him as “ugly” because he’s got a big nose, thin lips, and pockmark scars, and puts him out of her mind. Anna gets home soon enough and while washing off the mud from the accident, realizes she doesn’t really have any money to sustain herself, much less her maid and mother-in-law, and must seek employment. Though the elder Mrs. Wren is aghast because ladies “don’t work,” Anna insists on finding a job and lands one as a secretary to the mysterious Earl of Swartingham, whom no one in the village has ever met.

Naturally, the arrogant, ugly man who almost ran down Anna in the beginning of the book is Edward de Raaf, the Earl of Swartingham. When Eddie was a child, he was inflicted with small pox that killed his parents and siblings, leaving him emotionally and physically scarred. Basically, dude has a chip on his shoulder the size of a building. He can’t keep a secretary because he’s always yelling and starting fights, so imagine his surprise when his new one turns out to be the hot, sexy lady he hasn’t been able to to stop thinking about for days. All of a sudden, Edward wants to see her and hang out with her all the time because she’s super-sexy and is not intimidated by him or his looks. Too bad he’s about to get married to some baronet’s daughter because he needs a proper wife and a passel of kids. Whether he likes it or not, he has to get Anna out of his mind and attempts to do it by going to a high-priced bordello called Aphrodite’s Grotto, which guarantees a clean, available, willing woman for a price. Anna doesn’t think it’s fair that a man can just go out and get laid, while she, as a widow, has to remain chaste. Luckily, Aphrodite’s Grotto also caters to ladies… ladies who can wear a mask and pretend to be a whore for a night, that is. If Edward’s going to have some fun with some anonymous lady of the night, why shouldn’t it be Anna?

The Heroine: Anna is just… delightful. She has to take care of her mother-in-law and all, but she’s not a martyr and knows how to have fun. She’s not bitter about being barren, either. Yes, she would have liked to have children, but it just wasn’t in the cards and now she just wants to concentrate on being able to provide for herself and her dependents. She’s not shy about going after what she wants, either. She wants Edward and by God, she’s gonna get him. Even if it’s just for a couple of nights. But because she’s a romance heroine, she freaks and panics when Edward asks her to marry him because he’s an earl and she’s just… a penniless widow, damn it! Thankfully, Ms. Hoyt doesn’t drag these scenes out. Near the end, however, Anna almost loses me as a fan when she [spoiler!] allows a blackmailer to bully her into leaving Edward. But don’t worry. She regains my respect a minute later when she stops acting like a ninny, looks at the villain, and says, “Oh no you didn’t, biatch! Edward is mah man!” Awesome.

The Hero: For a supposedly ugly dude, Edward is super-hot. To compensate for the pockmarks, he’s got a really muscular, super-buff body. Duh. He’s gruff, bad-tempered, and insecure about his scars because his dead wife (died in childbirth) was repulsed by them and told him so just before she died. What I liked about Edward is even though he’s a bit of a dick and can’t seem to stop thinking about boning Anna for JUST ONE SECOND, he’s a nice, sweet guy. He keeps on servants even though they’re old and useless because they’ve been in the family for years, isn’t afraid to get dirty when he’s helping out his tenants, and genuinely listens to Anna when she’s got a grievance against him. I also enjoyed that he wasn’t Mr. Smooth. He’s like a big… bear who just attacks without thinking about it and is a bit of an oaf, but oh… so cute. And I loved that he has an ugly, smelly dog that he keeps around because it won’t leave him alone and it’s obvious that he loves the damn thing, even though he can’t come up with a name for it. How Holly Golightly of him!

The Secondary Characters: I loved the kindly old Mrs. Wren, Anna’s sensible mother-in-law, who is aware her dead son was a dickhead and treats Anna like the daughter she never had. She is smart, practical, and thankfully isn’t a matchmaker. Whew. There are some sequel-baiting here, with Eddie’s friends, Harry and Iddesleigh, but they mostly stay out of the way and don’t get in the way of the narrative. That means, they don’t walk around with neon signs over their heads that flash, “Buy my book! Love me!” Nobody has to tell Anna and Eddie how in luuuurve they are. Instead, Ms. Hoyt chooses to show us how right the two leads are for each other. How nouveau! I also enjoyed the two hooker sisters that Anna takes in. One sister is sassy, world-weary, and quite intriguing. Is she going to get her own book?

The Subplot: Pieces of the fairytale, The Raven Prince, are placed under the chapter headings and is narrated in conjunction with the main plot. I didn’t understand the connection. Basically, it’s about this girl forced to marry a big ole raven as repayment for the raven saving the girl’s father’s kingdom. Each night, a mysterious man comes to the girl to have some hot sexin’ with her, but in the morning, she has to hang out with the raven. Naturally, she gets curious enough to try and find out who is the mysterious man givin’ her the sexin’… and—- Oh… I get it! I think. NOT. Seriously, can anyone explain it to me? Oh, and there’s also a zany, trouble-making mistress who is determined to let the world know what a big ole whore Anna is because she’s convinced that Anna is trying to blackmail her, so the blackmailee becomes the blackmailer—- honestly, I didn’t really care too much about this. It was just… silly. I was too focused on reading about Anna and Eddie falling in luuuurve. *sigh*

The Final Word: I loved this… LOVED IT! Anna is wonderful as a heroine and Eddie is adorable as a big ole gruff bear. I really, really liked that Ms. Hoyt showed us how these two were friends first who genuinely like each other; sure, they’re lusting for each other throughout the piece, but it is also obvious that it’s more than sex because they seem to actually enjoy each other’s company. Anna gets a little dumb at the end with the whole, “I can’t marry you, you’re an Earl!” bullcrap, but gets over it right quick. Eddie predictably flies off the handle —-come on, that’s his thing!—- when he finds out that his mysterious lady lover and Anna, his staid secretary, are one and the same and is somehow convinced that Anna is laughing behind his back for successfully tricking him and makes it all about his stupid scars, but don’t worry… He grovels really prettily. Oh, man, this book was a lot of fun. Check it out if you’re looking for a fun, witty romance with hot, hot sex (the fireplace scene? wow!).

Buy this baby here.

Love, Peace, and Snarkage,

This entry was posted on Monday, April 23rd, 2007 at 10:17 am and is filed under Books, Grade: B, Romance: Historical. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.