Here’s something I wrote in 30 minutes for a freewriting exercise in my novella class. I am directly transcribing this from my writing journal, no editing. Please excuse if it sucks.

When I was fourteen years old, I lost my virginity to Hank Ericson. At the time, it didn’t really mean anything. Not to me, anyway. It was just something else to do on a slow, lazy Saturday afternoon. We had just watched Body Heat with Kathleen Turner and William Hurt— a VHS tape Hank had snuck out of his parents’ bedroom—and we sitting uncomfortably in my bedroom. My breasts—what little I have of them—felt tender and heavy and there was a cramp that felt like I was getting my period that tugged on my stomach. I turned to look at Hank. He had a Rubik’s cube in his hand and was trying very hard not to look at me.

“We should just do it,” I said suddenly.

“Do what?” He raised his head briefly to look at me. After a few seconds, he returned his attention to the Rubik’s cube, turning it over and over in his hands. His longish dark brown hair touched the collar of his shirt and curled at the ends. He needed a haircut.

He was sitting at the edge of my bed. I flopped on my stomach and planted my elbows next to him, propping my chin on my hands. My arm touched his corduroy pants. “I mean sex, you dummy.”

The Rubik’s cube fell out of his hands and he slowly sat up straighter. When he looked at me again, he was blushing a little and the little Adam’s apple in his throat was bobbing up and down. “Umm… what?”

“It’s not a big deal,” I said. “We just take off our clothes, then you get on top of me and—”

He bolted to his feet so quickly that I was nearly catapulted from the mattress. “Yeah, yeah, I know all that, but— are you crazy? We’re only fourteen!”

I have to mention that my mind is a little advanced compared to Hank’s when it comes to these matters. Last summer, I read Lady Chatterley’s Lover and whenever I got to a racy part, I would read it out loud to him and he would cover his ears.

“Hank, big deal! Everyone at school is doing it. We’re, like— the only virgins left!”

Hank was in a tizzy. He had shoved his hands in his hair and proceeded to wear a hole on my rug with his pacing. “I don’t mind being a virgin and neither should you! Girls are supposed to save it for marriage… or something.”

I sat up on my bed so I was sitting on my legs and crossed my arms tightly across my chest. “Hank, you are such a Catholic! Get with the program, will you? It’s the 90’s.”

Hank stopped his pacing and turned to look at me, his gangly arms akimbo. “June, Melinda Summers got pregnant. Do you want to be a mother at fourteen? It’s so stupid. She had to drop out of school.”

He looked like a mad scientist with his hair sticking up on all sides. I gave him a droll look. “Hank, Melinda Summers is a skank. She gave it up to half the JV football team last year.” I pulled a silver foil out of my pocket and shook it at him.

He snatched it out of my hand. “What the hell is this?”

“A condom, you retard. Honestly, Hank, you are such a child.”

He turned it over and over in his hands as though he had never seen one before. “June… where did you even get this?”

I rolled my eyes. “From the nurse’s office. They pass that stuff out like candy.”

He stared at me for a moment and a resigned expression came over his face. It’s the same one he gets when we’re arguing and he realizes he’s lost. “This is so stupid, June. We’re going to get caught.”

“Hank… by who? My parents? They’re too blazed out of their minds to care. Besides, I’m sure they’d prefer it if I lost it to you instead of some wannabe thug who thinks he’s a gangsta.”

He shook his head and looked at the tiny silver square in his hand. “This is… dumb.” He sighed and raised his eyes to me. “Wait a minute… you mean now? Today?”

I reached for the hem of my shirt. “No time like the present.”

He walked to the door and tested the doorknob to make sure it was locked. Running a hand through his dark hair, he returned to the bed and sat down next to me. “So… um… how do we do this?” He folded his hands on his lap and stared solemnly at them.

“Uh… I guess we can make out first. How should I know, Hank? It’s not like I’m an expert at this!” I tucked a lock of my hair behind my ear and cleared my throat. “Like, we’ll kiss and stuff… and then… um… you know, things will happen.”

He looked up from his hands. “Remember when I told you Keiko Sanders let me touch her boobs that one time?”

“Yeah?” Hank was generally a good boy. It was one of the naughtiest things he had ever done and I was proud of him for it.

“Umm… I lied.”

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