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The Harlequin by Laurell K. Hamilton

The HarlequinGrade: C+

A few folks have emailed me asking me if I was going to review this book and here it is. Rejoice! If you’re expecting a rant where I totally lose my shit and promise never to read LKH again, you’re reading the wrong review. I don’t know if I’ve become immune to the ardeur or Anita’s many lovers or the editorial mistakes (there’s a HUGE one on page 238 that is an ENORMOUS CONTINUITY ERROR and makes a total liar of the earlier books of the series— but I was told this was merely a typo), but… you know, I did not experience frothing at the mouth while reading this entry to the Anita Blake series. My main reaction? Meh. For those of you who have read my LKH reviews, that’s a BIG improvement from “ZOMGWTFBBQ I HATE YOU LKH I WILL NEVER READ YOU AGAIN WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS I HATE YOU AND I HATE YOUR FACE!!!!!!!!1111!!” What I will tell you is how much I dreaded reading this book (though I pre-ordered it 8 months in advance— I’m sick, I need help) because I heard rumors that my favorite ice-cold sociopath Edward is going to be in it (he is!) and was afraid this is the book in which Anita and Edward will consummate their friendship (and let’s face it, Edward is the only hold-over from the earlier books that Anita has not yet had sex with or shoved out of her life). Let me just ease your mind (SPOILER!) and say… they don’t. There. Now you can breathe. As for the rest of the book… Meh. I was bored by all the politics and the sex and the standing-around-discussing-how-cool-Anita-is (and couldn’t be arsed enough to pay attention, so I may have one or fifty factual errors in this post), but for the first time since Narcissus in Chains, I am seeing the light of the end of the tunnel. It’s a very, very tiny, faint light… but it’s there! I mean, this book didn’t make me stick a knife into my eye or anything. You guys, I think the Anita Blake we knew and loved might be coming back…

Yes, I’m sick. I need help.

Before I go on with this review, let me just list the people that Anita has sex with in this book: Richard, Micah, Rafael (yes, the Rat King!), Donovan (the King of Swans… eww)… and that’s it [Ed. Note: Hmm… this can’t be right. She usually has sex with at least 10-11 people!]. Anita, apparently, is learning how to control the ardeur better. Hmmm… Oh, and before I forget: Anita has her first lesbian experience. Yes… and she liked it!

The Plot: (Oh, like you guys care) The story begins with Malcolm, the leader of the city’s vampire church, going to Anita to help him out with some vampire garbage that I can’t be arsed to recall. Needless to say, Malcolm calls Anita an immoral whore and Anita gets pissed (we also get reminded that Anita is a federal marshal who has the power to execute vampires— huh… I’d forgotten all about that. Thanks, LKH!). I could be remembering it wrong, but I think Malcolm’s vampires are supposed to be in trouble because they are not blood-oathed to a Master of the City (who is Jean Claude), so that means any big-cheese vampire can come and make them his bitch because they are not protected by a Master. Also, he’s bitching ’cause Anita has a warrant of execution for a couple of his vampires and— zzzzzzzz. Oh who cares. Meanwhile, a group of vampire assassins called The Harlequin (soooo mysterious, no one knows who they are!) are suddenly sniffing around Jean-Claude and his kiss (what you call a group of vampires *eye roll*) probably because they are violating all sorts of metaphysical rules or some shit. The Harlequin have spies everywhere and can do all sorts of psychic shit to mess with you FROM A DISTANCE. Anyway, they send Anita a plain white mask, which is supposed to be a warning that she and the gang are about to be fucked with vampirically. On top of that, the pissed off Mother of All Vampires wants a piece of Anita’s ass and Belle Morte, the mother of Jean-Claude’s bloodline before Jean-Claude developed one of his own, wants Anita to dump Jean-Claude and be her lover-girl. A good lot of them react by running around like a bunch of decapitated chickens. Hilarity ensue.

On the lycanthrope front, Anita’s body is now a metaphysical zoo. To date, she has the following strains of lycanthropy in her blood: wolf, leopard, hyena (?), lion… and now… TIGER! She’s got a were-liger ( “lion and a tiger mixed… bred for its skills in magic”) inside of her! Anyway, Richard (her #1 werewolf lover) is no longer human, but a FUCKING CARICATURE OF THE MAN HE USED TO BE. He is whiny, too insecure to be real, and spends the entire book crying and endangering people’s lives because Anita won’t give up her menagerie of lovers and live in a house surrounded by a white picket fence with him, so he’d rather sulk in some corner than help Anita fight the monsters, thus almost getting Jean-Claude and Anita killed (good call, Richard!) and a host of other people that I don’t mind so much. IN WHAT UNIVERSE WOULD THAT MAKE SENSE, RICHARD?!?!? GOD! As if that’s not enough, the were-lions are useless pieces of shit that Anita has to worry about and a thug from Chicago named Haven, a were-lion, wants to take over the Saint Louis pride. The lioness inside Anita wants to have sex with Haven because he is a strong, strong man, but Anita is reluctant to have anything to do with him… ’cause he’s a psycho.

Desperate and unable to handle things on her own, Anita begs Edward to come to Saint Louis to help her, and Edward, who has always been the soul of sanity and reason, inexplicably brings Olaf, a serial killer with a hard-on for Anita, and Peter, his sixteen year old emotionally damaged stepson-to-be.

The Heroine: Anita is a constantly growing character— she may not be moving in the direction we want, but at least she is constantly evolving. We have to give her that. She doesn’t seem to be homophobic anymore (did I mention a woman GIVES ANITA ORAL SEX AND SHE LIKES IT?) and though I miss the violence and gore of the older books, Anita seems to be growing into a preach-love-not-hate kind of girl and I dig that. The ardeur is also evolving. It’s not just about sex anymore. It’s kind of like a healing, loving thing that just happens to radiate from Anita’s vagina. Wouldn’t the world be a better place to live if our problems can be solved by having copious amounts of sexual orgies? Anyway, I just wish that this ever-evolving Anita would just blast a hole through Richard’s skull already. Anita can’t have a fun, harmonious, love-only menagerie if Richard comes along once in a while and FUCKS EVERYTHING UP. Me, I’ve come to understand the ardeur— I don’t necessarily want it around, but I do understand that it’s part of Anita now. So kill Richard already, Anita!

I’m sick, I need help.

The Hero(es): Richard is a crazy, unreasonable douchebag, and honestly, I really, really hate that guy. Nathaniel seems to be growing into his own, though he is still damaged and doesn’t feel fulfilled in his relationship with Anita ’cause Anita won’t beat him up. Seriously. Jean-Claude puts in a couple of cameo appearances and though he is an integral part of this storyline, we don’t see him much this time around. Huh. Weird. Asher shows up… once, I think, but he is mentioned a lot. And Edward… he is here, he is the same, and yet… he now sports a vulnerability courtesy of a woman he is in love with and her two children. Aww. I’m sorry, but I love this guy (though he doesn’t give Anita the pimp-slap she deserves and seems to be supportive of her shenanigans). He seems to be sacrosanct when it comes to LKH’s eyes and I don’t think we have to worry about Anita fucking him. They’re more like brother-and-sister. As for Micah, he has now reached epic Marty-Stu proportions that you must see to believe:

“I’m not having sex with anyone but Anita, and I don’t have a problem with this,” Micah said.

“No, of course you don’t, because you’re perfect,” Richard said.

Micah looked at me, as if asking how much fight to have.

“Don’t fight,” I said. “Let’s eat, then we’ll talk about what to say to Rafael.” [Ed. note: How’s this - “Oh, Rafael, you’re the only one that hasn’t fallen into my vagina! Come here, you big Mexican Rat man!”]

“And just because she says ‘don’t fight’, you won’t fight, will you?” Richard asked.

“Usually, no,” Micah said.

“Sometimes, Micah, I hate you,” Richard said.

“Right back at you,” Micah said with a smile.

How nauseating. Richard = unreasonable baby-man psycho. Micah = sweetness and light. Get it? Got it? Good.

The Secondary Characters: Have you ever played a “I wonder whatever happened to…” while reading an Anita Blake book? WELL, Sports Fans, don’t y’all worry your pretty little heads because they’re all HERE!! (Except for Larry Kirkland, but who needs that guy? Bert is also missing… and let’s see… oh, Ronnie! But who cares about her? She’s a guuuuurl!) The cast of secondary characters are split into TWO groups: those who haaaaate Anita and those who luuuuuurve Anita. There’s nobody here who’s “Anita who? Eh, she’s a’ight.” I’ve also noticed that Ms. LKH seems to cast women as 1) villains 2) jeallouze of Anita 3) skanky lesbians 4) or all of the above. Anita doesn’t have a WOMAN FRIEND who’s just there for her (yes, there’s Marianne, her psychic therapist, but bitches, please… you know she’s gonna get revealed as a bad person soon or later) and doesn’t want anything from her and isn’t secretly jeallouze of her. Without further ado, here are the characters milling about this book who has more than 2 lines:

1) Requiem - he’s a vampire who ANNOYINGLY randomly recites poetry for no reason and LKH doesn’t hesitate to remind us that that’s what he does. I believe he’s addicted to the ardeur and wants to be Anita’s one and only man (who doesn’t?).
2) Wicked and Truth - They seem to be useful in an asskicking capacity and aren’t blatantly obvious in their pursuit of Anita, if they want her at all (wait, of course they do!)
3) Zebrowski - it’s true, he puts in an appearance! Sadly, he doesn’t give Anita the pimp-slap she deserves.
4) Dolph - scarier than ever with his monster prejudice; his only purpose is to show the reader how much Anita has deviated from the earlier books
5) Dr. Lilian - Man, I love this old broad. She’s a rat AND a doctor AND a Woman… and she’s not evil. Yet.
6) Claudia - another rat who is a FEMALE and one of Anita’s bodyguards, but her loyalty is possibly to Rafael, not Anita
7) Graham - Half Japanese, Half White… all lustful for Anita. That’s it.
8) Rafael - The Rat King, who— for some reason— all of a sudden wants to have sex with Anita because he hears it gives people powers and he thinks it will strengthen his alliance with Jean Claude
9) The Harlequin - Oh, who gives a crap about them. There’s fizznuckin’ to be done!
10) Peter - the sixteen year old boy who was raped and brutalized in Obsidian Butterfly is now Edward’s protege and has a hard-on for Anita
11) Olaf - we saw him in Obsidian Butterfly. He was the serial killer who kills dark-haired women and thinks Anita is his one twooo wuv. Freak.
12) Jason - Who? Exactly!
13) Sylvie and Cherry - Sylvie is Richard’s second-in-command and was revealed to be a militant lesbian in the earlier books. Here, she’s not (see page 238). Cherry is a wereleopard who is a nurse and I was happy to see her because we haven’t seen the other wereleopards for a while, which is weird because ANITA IS THE QUEEN OF THE WERELEOPARDS.
14) Jamil - Richard’s main bodyguard. Who we don’t see? Shang-da. ‘Cause he’s dead.
15) London, Byron, Clay - They all want to have sex with Anita
16) Malcolm - his one purpose is to call Anita an immoral whore, so that her supporters can go, “you’re wrong. shadddup. you’re just jeallouze.”


Oh My Word: My main problem with this book is the pacing. There isn’t as much sex in it as the previous books in the series, but a good 70% of this story consist of the characters standing around, discussing how powerful Anita is becoming, how wonderful and frightening the ardeur is, and how much trouble they’re going to be in when The Harlequin comes after them. The pacing is just very awkward. There are too many scenes with too many talking heads telling each other stuff they should already know. There are better ways to convey exposition and none of them are utilized in this book. I was also a little confused about the length of time upon which the story unfolds. In one scene, Edward tells Anita he will be in Saint Louis in “four hours,” but we don’t see him till four or five chapters later. There are just too many scenes of folks castigating Anita for her lifestyle, just so Anita can get on a soapbox and justify her choices to people. Each chapter includes a scene like that: Richard will call Anita names, Anita will respond by saying she’s “more comfortable with the monsters than he is”; Malcolm will call Anita a whore, her supporters would be like, “shut up, you’re just jeallouze!” Too much time is spent with folks standing around how powerful Anita is becoming and how everyone wants to have sex with her, so they can get super-powers too. It all gets… repetitive and rather dull. Too much emphasis was placed on how Edward will react when he finds out about the ardeur, but as it turned out, he’s totally cool with it. I was like, “Huh. That was anti-climactic.” The showdown with the villains was pretty much designed to show the reader how powerful Anita has gotten and the effect of her magic vagina on everyone who has been in contact with it. It was sickening.

Is it too much to ask for one character to root for in all of this assfuckery and circle jerkiness? There isn’t one person in this whole series that has a real discernible quality that will distinguish him/her from the crowd of 1) Anita-lovers 2) Anita-haterz. It seems that’s all the personality you need in this universe. Character traits? What’s that? Pfft.

On the bright side, it seems Anita is gaining better control over the ardeur. It’s not about sex anymore, but… love. And that’s a cool idea, I guess. I don’t know how happy I’d be to read about Anita giving out rainbows and teddy bears she had yanked out of her magic vagina, but hey… it’s something. I was also happy to see Anita use her guns in this book and her blasting away the bad guys instead of just making sweet, sweet lurve to them. I’m not holding out hope that the series is going to be restored to its former glory, but I’m starting to think there might be a method to LKH’s madness. I’ll probably read the next book and the next and the next. ‘Cause I’m sick and I need help. *sigh*

Love, Peace, and Snarkage

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This entry was posted on Friday, June 15th, 2007 at 9:49 am and is filed under Books, Grade: C, Sci-Fi/Fantasy, Suspense/Horror. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.

35 Responses to “The Harlequin by Laurell K. Hamilton”

  1. Karmyn
    Posted: Jun 16th, 2007 at 2:54 pm
    1

    I’ve heard this wasn’t as bad as previous books, but not as good as the early books. She still needs to just get rid of Richard or give him his spine back. Okay, we get it. Richard is ex-husband. Micah is new husband/fanboi. We have working brain cells and can remember the characters better than the woman who wrote the books. That is so sad.

  2. Ann Bruce
    Posted: Jun 16th, 2007 at 4:09 pm
    2

    I borrowed the book from the library (LKH will not be getting anymore of my money except for the $12 annual library fee) and have been reading it in short spurts to keep my sanity. In between snatches of The Harlequin, I’ve been reading JA Konrath to remind myself that there are writers and books out there that don’t make me want to hurt someone.

    So far, I still want Edward to go in with a flamethrower and clear out Anitaverse post-Obsidian Butterfly. Or maybe just get rid of Micah and Nathaniel. They both creep me out.

    Strangely, I don’t mind the Merry Gentry series nearly as much as the Anita Blake series. But I still think LKH has a disturbing fixation with 80s hair bands.

  3. BevL(QB)
    Posted: Jun 16th, 2007 at 4:49 pm
    3

    Oh, Bam. I’m a complete Anita fangirl and reviewed it with a completely different interpretation than you. Whatevah. Believe it or not, I’m one of the LKH fangirls that still retains a sense of humor and can even see how those that don’t agree with me formed their opinions (so long as they attack the books, not the author’s personal life). You’ve got a few facts from the book wrong, but since I read the ARC twice and didn’t catch a couple of obvious errors, I don’t really have any business pointing fingers.
    ~
    So I only have one place where I will say “I can’t believe you said that!” For me, the Micah vs. Richard snark sessions are my favorite parts of the last couple of books. Freakin’ hilarious! And in this one, I LMAO when Jean-Claude shut everybody the hell up- he so let’s us know who the Master of the City is in this one!

  4. Charlene
    Posted: Jun 16th, 2007 at 5:49 pm
    4

    So what’s the Harlequin’s main weapon? Secret babies?

  5. AnimeJune
    Posted: Jun 16th, 2007 at 6:59 pm
    5

    I busted a gut with that editor’s note of yours about “falling into Anita’s vagina.” Ha!

    Can’t she find herself a nice Catholic boy who’s willing to abstain until marriage?? No? No? Could I sound anymore like my grandmother?

    My mum used to be an Anita Blake fan (she had about, what, ten of the books before she cut herself off) - and when I wanted to read them when I was 16, she said “You may read the first three, but nothing else until you’re 18.” I never read anything past the first one.

  6. kate r
    Posted: Jun 16th, 2007 at 7:09 pm
    6

    I [heart] Charlene

  7. Flo
    Posted: Jun 17th, 2007 at 1:20 am
    7

    Spanks Bam! *throws cookies at Bam* For your efforts!

    This won’t make me buy it. I’m so tired of seeing RAZ as the whipping boy. He can never ever get away, Anita will never kill him, so Hamilton will just keep him miserable and wrong no matter what he does.

    Cause ya know someone’s got to hate on Anita so she can pretend she’s so hurt and defend herself!

    As for Edward going “Yeah I’m cool you’re a super ho!” whaaaa? LULZ. I just wanted her and Ed to throw down. That would have been all kinds of awesome. Too bad we’ll never see that!

    And all I can think of about the luuuuuv ardon’t is if she pulls teddy bears and kittens and rainbows out of her vagina and she’s a rainmaker… would that make them sloppy and gross?

    *cringes* I SORRY! I COULD NOT RESIST THE ICKY!

  8. December/Stacia
    Posted: Jun 17th, 2007 at 4:13 am
    8

    I was hoping you’d read this one so I didn’t have to!

    Rafael: Sooo, Anita…I hear if I have sex with you it will give me SUPAH POWAHS…

    Anita: (sighs and lifts her skirt) Yeah, climb on in. I’m all about the love.

    That stinks. Rafael was my other favorite aside from Edward, I hate to see him boarding the Hoo-ha train too.

  9. kardis
    Posted: Jun 17th, 2007 at 5:03 am
    9

    I’ve pretty much given up the hope that Anita will come back. I really don’t care about the ways the character herself has changed, that was fine with me. It’s the boring that kills me. Even my comment on the boring is boring me. Thanks for posting the review Bam!

  10. Kismet
    Posted: Jun 17th, 2007 at 6:25 am
    10

    The only reason Richard has morphed into an unreasonable asshat is because he’s based on LKH’s ex-husband. Micah is based on her current husband/boyfriend/whatevah, so that is why he is “super good awesome incredible.”

  11. kate r
    Posted: Jun 17th, 2007 at 7:09 am
    11

    Didn’t Rafael climb aboard a few books back? I haven’t read on in a couple of years. Who’re her two standard bedwarmers? I thought it was Rafael and Micah.

    Morning breath in that bed must be hideous, what with all the species gathered in there.

  12. bam
    Posted: Jun 17th, 2007 at 7:19 am
    12

    Who’re her two standard bedwarmers? I thought it was Rafael and Micah.

    Nope. Nathaniel and Micah.

  13. Flo
    Posted: Jun 17th, 2007 at 10:39 am
    13

    Nobody has morning breath, or smells bad, or gets their hair tangled in the Anitaverse! That would be sooooo unsexay!

    *pictures someone flossing with Nate’s hair*

    *dies laughing*

  14. mee
    Posted: Jun 17th, 2007 at 1:13 pm
    14

    I actually managed to give up the Anita series before she had sex with anyone! Loved the early books but so far resisting the sexathon ones. Should I pick them up? What book would people here have stopped at given hindsight?

    The Merry books are different I think I can accept the multitude of walking dildos with great hair in that because LKH set it up that way from the start. I read on just to see how it all ends. With Anita we know from how it started that it could be a whole lot better….

  15. Charlene Teglia
    Posted: Jun 17th, 2007 at 1:47 pm
    15

    I really enjoyed this one. Lots of things happened that I’ve been waiting for. More developments with the Mother of Darkness! Edward! And a clear antagonist revealed in the opening and dealt with at the end. I really thought the Harlequin was a cool antagonist, by the way. The masks? Creeeeeeppppy! Seriously, they were genuinely scary and I liked that.

  16. katieM
    Posted: Jun 17th, 2007 at 3:30 pm
    16

    No. You cannot make me give that woman any more of my money or my time!!! I have resisted by inoculating myself with lots of Armstrong and Murphy!

  17. Josie
    Posted: Jun 17th, 2007 at 3:37 pm
    17

    I made a promise to myself that Laurell K Hamilton would get no more of my time or hard earned cash and I have stuck to it for two years now. If only I could stop reading and commenting on reviews. Sigh.

    All I’m going to say is thank Christ she didn’t have sex with Edward. I just couldn’t have coped… Not that I’m going to read the book or anything. Nope. Not me, just not interested. At all. Honest.

  18. Janeo
    Posted: Jun 17th, 2007 at 5:24 pm
    18

    I just want the series to be about Anita and Jean Claude’s adventures and Richard dead with silver bullets from Anita’s gun. Is that asking too much?

    Janeo
    on da farm

  19. lightlyfell
    Posted: Jun 18th, 2007 at 2:42 am
    19

    The review intruiged me and the book doesn’t sound as bad as the others, but that’s not saying much. I won’t read it, mostly because it makes me sick to read over and over how wonderful Anita is. And Nathanial creeps me out. So does Micah. Actually, everyone Anita sleeps with, except Jean-Claude and Jason, and if they’re not in this one, why bother?

    If I see it sitting on a library shelf sometime I may pick it up, but yes, no more of my money to LKH, even if Anita becomes a mere human being again.

    I love lots of sex in a book, that’s mostly why I read that stuff, but her sex scenes are so boring! Just once, just once, shut up and fuck! Do you have to TALK about it?

    For me the perfect book would be where she willingly goes to Jean-Claude, who has put up with so much, throws him against a wall and does him, then happily and with no guilt goes skipping off, necromances her day job, and then eventually, after a late dinner with girlfriends, goes home to Micah, since he’s been cleaning her house all day. And since he’s so wonderful, let HIM sleep with Nathanial. He’d do it, he’s her twue wuv, after all.

    Maybe next book?

  20. Jane
    Posted: Jun 18th, 2007 at 6:31 am
    20

    Eh. I’m over her. Have no desire to read this series anymore.

  21. Gwen
    Posted: Jun 18th, 2007 at 9:26 am
    21

    HAHAHAHAHA! I died laughing when I read:

    “Is it too much to ask for one character to root for in all of this assfuckery and circle jerkiness?”

    As well as about 10 other times in your review Bam. Thanks for the rundown! I, like you, will not be able to help myself and will have to read the book. It’s an addiction. *sigh*

  22. dl
    Posted: Jun 18th, 2007 at 11:25 am
    22

    IMO the two series have switched…MG was good, but the last one seriously sucked…AB was going downhill, but this new one is an improvement.

    The pre-acknowledgement to Jonathan squicked me. Richards ongoing (an on and on and on) angst is becoming beyond tedious and needs to go away (he clearly represents her x). Rafael shifting from respected friend to potential sex partner was kinda…gross, unnecessary (does the author have any decency boundaries?). Is nobody safe from the sex machine that Anita has become? Appreciate her return to fighting bad guys.

    Towards the end, I was trying to remember the last time AB & JC had sex? Lately, he just seems happy to pimp her out to gain power while she has sex with some powerful dude…I find this disturbing. LKH’s willingness to victimize minor children to forward her plots is also icky.

    Overall, an improvement on her last several AB books. The book ended with a preview of the upcoming MG. After her last installment, I’m cringing. Merry was naked the entire book…bouncing boobs, and leaking sperm until the very last page or two…eewh.

  23. Ann Bruce
    Posted: Jun 18th, 2007 at 4:03 pm
    23

    Charlene,

    You actually find the AB books creepy? I USED to find them intriguing and imaginative and so many other good words, but creepy they never were–until Anita started sleeping with everything on two feet…and four and things with fur and things with feathers. Like I said, I especially find Micah and Nathaniel creepy. I don’t know why but Anita screwing those two just makes me go ick.

    Almost finished the book…and am still wishing someone would bitch-slap Edward so he’d take out Anita’s harem.

  24. Jackie
    Posted: Jun 18th, 2007 at 6:18 pm
    24

    Bam, dearest, thank you SO much for reading this book for me.

    I will always (heart) Edward. He’s no Hunter Rose, but man, he’s still a psycho killer after my own dark, twisted heart. Yum.

  25. Jaynie R
    Posted: Jun 18th, 2007 at 7:05 pm
    25

    I’m jealous. I have to wait for the paperback. But, I’m still a sick fan girl. Sometimes it’s like watching a train wreck, but I don’t think I’ll ever give up on the series.

  26. Shiloh
    Posted: Jun 18th, 2007 at 9:04 pm
    26

    i’m still debating on whether to get it or not. I sitll have the last one sitting, unread, on my bookshelf. Maybe I’ll give it a few more books before I decide to continue or not.

    i dunno.

  27. Samantha
    Posted: Jun 19th, 2007 at 7:50 am
    27

    Awesome review, though even if you’d said it completely, horribly sucked more than normal I’d still read it. It’s an addiction, just like heroin; therefore it has to suck. At least there’s some Edward in this one :) .

  28. AngieZ
    Posted: Jun 19th, 2007 at 10:38 am
    28

    If you’re expecting a rant where I totally lose my shit and promise never to read LKH again, you’re reading the wrong review. I don’t know if I’ve become immune to the ardeur or Anita’s many lovers or the editorial mistakes (there’s a HUGE one on page 238 that is an ENORMOUS CONTINUITY ERROR and makes a total liar of the earlier books of the series— but I was told this was merely a typo), but… you know, I did not experience frothing at the mouth while reading this entry to the Anita Blake series. My main reaction? Meh.

    I did come here today hoping to find your review for The Harlequin. Given the fact that Amazon is currently rating it as 4 1/2 stars I was considering it. Your overall lack of heat tells me volumes about this book. I will not be buying it and may only pick it up when it show up in paperback form at garage sales.

    Perhaps you are on the road to recovery and are now past the anger stage. You are starting to accept the books for the trash they have become and may yet be able to break that addiction.

  29. FerfeLaBat
    Posted: Jun 19th, 2007 at 2:05 pm
    29

    Good review. Of course I’m buying it. *Sheeping off to the corner to read*

  30. bam
    Posted: Jun 19th, 2007 at 2:27 pm
    30

    and what does it say about me that LKH leaves me only wanting for more! MOOOOOOOOORE!

  31. SweetNSourGirl
    Posted: Jun 19th, 2007 at 5:08 pm
    31

    I’m actually in the middle of it right now and I can faintly see the workings of a plot. “The Harelquin” just gets too bogged down with the whole political junk that’s going on and everyone wanting to fuck Anita.

    I’ve reached the point where I can no longer relate to Anita and I ALMOST don’t give a crap anymore. She’s too busy trying to police everyone into people she wants them to be. And she’s got too much supernatural shit in her system that I can’t keep track of it. It’s rather annoying, really. I miss Ronnie. Cherry, Dr. Lillian and Claudia are the only chicks Anita doesn’t hate. Edward is still cool, but he’s gotten all soft and gooey like chocolate left out in the sun. I miss Jason too, he’s damn funny. Hell, Anita used to be funny too, what the fuck happened? Anita had wit and zazz and a bit of an attitude now it’s “how far do her limits reach?” But you’re right Bam, even 300 pages into I, I do see a light at the tunnel for the series and its former awesomeness.

    BTW the Merry Gentry series was supposed to be a deterrent for all the sexin’ in Anita Blake. Hmmmm…I wonder how well that worked.

  32. Jackie
    Posted: Jun 20th, 2007 at 9:16 am
    32

    Edward is still cool, but he’s gotten all soft and gooey like chocolate left out in the sun.

    Awwwwwwww, no!

    **mope**

  33. FerfeLaBat
    Posted: Jun 24th, 2007 at 7:39 am
    33

    Bought it. Read it. I now hate myself even more. I was ok. Really. Right up to the last chapter or so where the metaphysical fight between good and evil.

  34. Auschust
    Posted: Jun 26th, 2007 at 1:14 pm
    34

    Brilliant review, you really captured what LKH has been doing to Anita, dwindling her down to a sex crazed tool. Whatever happened to Dominga Salvador? If we could get some of that shit back we might have a series worth reading for reasons other than nostalgia. Kill Richard, have some sex with Jean-Claude and Mommie dearest, and discover some cool zombie shit. Is that too much to ask? No more new lovers!

  35. Maria S.
    Posted: Jul 12th, 2007 at 10:33 am
    35

    i am just glad i got it from the library and didn’t shell out actual money for it…i will always read Anita, but never buy again, unless used. and i am so totally hetero-in-love with you Bam, i think i just had sex with you in my mind…..and it was GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!

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