Darragha Foster is known for her… um… rather unique storylines to say the least. She’s given us a were-whale for a hero, an incubus with a penis made of ice, and a series involving horny Norse gods messing with us poor mortals. She’s known for her funny, quirky writing… so it stands to reason that her interview… would not be so normal.

Q: I hear you’re getting cut. You know…not circumcision or anything like that, but weight loss surgery. Tell me about it.

A: I am having lapband surgery on 9/19. It is not exactly getting “cut.” It’s more like “being poked.” But in a good way that doesn’t involve the bony fingers of Yentas or my husband’s penage. Of course, when the husband and I were asked to explain three things we are looking forward to after I lose some serious (and humorous) poundage, is elevator sex. He’s a big boy. 6′4″ and very strong. He’s gonna slam my back against the wall of a moving elevator and we are going to rock and roll up 30 floors. But I digress. Way too often. A lapband is laproscopic. No re-arranging of intestines or full-belly incisions required.

Q: What are you writing?

A: The sequel to The Orca King. Big Tom (the Orca King, himself) and his son, Tommy, meet Rule Jentry–an erotic romance reviewer hell-bent on destroying the good name of the author of The Orca King and any vestige of romance on Orcas Island. Yeah…I’m poking (what’s with all the poking?) fun at myself–and, ah…YOU…and some other nameless former and/or current reviewers in this book. I just wrote the “Rule sandwich on the forest floor in the rain” scene. Know what I mean? Well, do ya?

Q: What do you have coming out?

A: Of the closet? Oh, you mean new releases, huh? September: Mooncusser Cove. Mooncusser Cove — A modern day retelling of Frankenstein with a Brigadoon twist. Ghost ships! Curses! Land pirates! Vampires who feed on sexual energy! The persecution of witches! Just another day at Vespers by the Sea bed-and-breakfast at Mooncusser Cove. Molten Silver: kinks: public sex, the abuse of English cucumbers, antique car sex, alternative personal orifice sex, vampirism, possession, trickery, deceit and general acts of piratey mayhem.

And in October: Of Flesh and Blood, a “vampire” anthology with Tina Holland and Celine Chatilion. My tale is Polishing Saber.

Polishing Saber is not your average vampire tale. These ain’t your mama’s Carpathians. In Iceland, the vampires are tall, blonde and environmentally-minded. Vampires in the land of fire and ice is nice! Molten Silver: anilingus, consumption of sheep’s blood, the wearing of human skin.

Q: You are kind of the Liquid Silver Psychic Queen. You’ve been giving freebie quickie readings for a couple of years on the House of SiN forum. And man, you are scary good. I heard you’ve started giving full readings for $5.00. Why?

A: Because baby needs new shoes! I’m going to lose 70% of my fat (but never my PHAT) over the next year. I need some extra spending money for new clothes–even though one of my goals is to walk into Value Village or GoodWill and be able to buy funky clothing off-the-rack (which I can rarely do now). So, the deal is: one question for $5.00 or buy one of my books and email me the receipt to darragha @ gmail.com. My experience and a link to drop me a five-spot is on my blog: www.chameleons-on-plaid.com. You want a reference? Ask Bam!

It’s true. I’ve never been to believe tarot-readings or anything, but on a whim, I asked Darragha to give me a read. And damn, it was scary accurate. The lady has talent.

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