A Dilemma of the Worst Kind

Lemme spell it out to ya like I’m hooked on phonics and shit… I owe my homie Shuzluva— my sista from another mother— like, five thousand words by tomorrow, ya feel me? But I peep in the box o’ mail and shit, and guess what I found? My very own copy of Lover Unbound. Well, daaaayum. What’s a homegirl to do now? I’m in a bind here, kids. Help a bitch out!

P.S. I shit you not, as soon as I opened up the package from Amazon, my iPod started blaring “Pimp of the Year” by Dru Down. How creepy is that?

Mack playas ballas grindas.
Yeah I’m the real true pimp of the year.
Will ya feel me.
Ha ha pimp of the mutha’ fuckin’ year.

Give it up give it up a-give it to me. A big mack capitalized double D.
see. And it’s on so I’m a get sick wit it a-give me drank da bomb
and let me get wit it. Yee-yah ’cause I’m gonna be the biggest pimp of
the year goin’ around doin’ shit like this here. ‘Cause a nigga is
strong, and way too long when it comes to my ding dong…

14 Responses to “A Dilemma of the Worst Kind”

  1. April
    1

    Hm. Do the 5,000 words have to make any sense? Or can they be lorem ipsum quality stuff?

  2. Jambrea
    2

    Ask for an extension? It won’t take you long to read Lover Unbound because you won’t be able to put it down! Hopefully Shuzluva is a JR Ward fan as well and she’ll understand! :)

  3. Sandie
    3

    Hey Sugga!
    Good luck with the words, they will come…cause you are awesome.
    :)

    I just gotta say that I really loved this book…even if it skimped on V’s story some…I can’t wait to see what you think. I’m gonna post my review this weekend.

    Bring on Phury. Not so sure about Cormia.

    Peace!
    Sandie

  4. Kerry Allen
    4

    Got mine yesterday too. Screw prior commitments, I say! Would have finished it, but my eyes gave out about two-thirds of the way through. Still waiting to stumble across any of the issues people who had it last week have bemoaned.

    I feel V’s getting full coverage. Maybe it’s because the bulk of my reading for a while has been not-romance, so I’ve gotten used to not every page being devoted to the H/H’s journey. Personally, I like all the ancillary action.

  5. jen
    5

    I got it Tuesday, finished it wednesday.

    It breaks down like this for me:
    If it involved V and Jane — it sucked
    If it involved JM - it was great
    If it involved Phury - excellent

    I was so excited when I picked it up at 502 pages! At that point I was unaware that 400 of them sucked!

    I will not spoil it for you, but there are chapters in this bad boy that remind me of LKH wandering through a plot line and forgetting where the hell she was going.

    I will still buy Phury… I will buy it in Hardback even…. sickness.

  6. Ann Bruce
    6

    You already have my run-down of LU, but read it because you’re not going to be able to concentrate on anything else until you do.

  7. Lorelie
    7

    Bring on Phury. Not so sure about Cormia.

    Totally feel ya. Cormia needs to grow some backbone. Maybe even a ball or two.

    I was talking to a friend about the book and she asked if Phury’s woman was introduced yet:
    Me: “Yep.”
    Her: “What’s she like?”
    Me: “Marissa.”
    Her: “Eeewwww.”

    As for the book as a whole, I’m not sure what I think about it. It’s a must read if you’ve done the others but. . . I had problems with the way V’s history was revealed. It was like it didn’t have any real impact on the story, it was just tossed in there because J.R. Ward knew she’d built up this horrid past that must be explained for him.

  8. shuzluva
    8

    Jambrea: Yes, I am a JR Ward PHAN. However:

    THAT IS NO EXCUSE!!! WRITE WHILE YOU READ. YES, I AM WRITING IN ALL CAPS BECAUSE I’M SCREAMING. DO YOU EMAIL ME TO TELL ME THIS? NO!!! DO I HAVE TO COME HERE TO FIND OUT YOU’RE SHIRKING YOUR WRITING RESPONSIBILITY? YES!!!

    *deep breaths, because pregnant women can’t scream for prolonged periods due to reduced lung capacity*

    You best get crackin’ before I come out there an hurt you. And you know I mean that very fondly.

    *Runs off to buy her copy of Lover Unbound*

  9. bam
    9
    Author Comment

    WRITE WHILE YOU READ.

    What, so my hero can go around saying, “Ya feel me?” even though he’s a white boy from La Jolla? Although that might make him a lot more… Butch.

    I won’t pick up LU until my characters have established themselves. But damn, I was at a UBS yesterday and found a sweet copy of The Bachman Books

    *deep breaths, because pregnant women can’t scream for prolonged periods due to reduced lung capacity*

    And chill, baby. :) You might pop a vein. Ya feel me?

  10. shuzluva
    10

    Honey, I’m gonna make you FEEL THIS!!!

    Love ya!

  11. lisabea
    11

    Jen: It didn’t really suck (the V and Jane bit) it just got too little air time. I sorta wanted to see V bottom for Butch *squirms in chair*, but, since that didn’t happen…the Jane thing was good. Just too little. Kinda wham bam thank you ma’am. (heh)

    And Phury is a whiner. Boo Hoo. He needs to pull up his drawers, quit smokin weed, and be a man. Oh, wait, that’s the next book: Lover Inhaled.

  12. fiveandfour
    12

    I can’t wait to see what you think of this one, bam - I’m still not quite sure what I think if it myself. Sometimes seeing other people articulate their thoughts helps me frame my own opinions better - I have something to react to positively and negatively. I suppose I should get out there and look for some reviews and find myself an opinion :-) .

  13. Julie
    13

    Yeah I was still holding out for a Butch & V hookup, but I guess it’s time to accept the fact that I’m delusional. :) No, wait… maybe they’ll get together in Phury’s book?

  14. Jaded Bee
    14

    I’m just really bored at work (I work in the computer lab at the Library) and have seen you say that Shuzluva is your “sister from another mother” a couple times on here and that just reminded me of what me and my best friend call each other. Sister from another Mister. Just thought you might find that amusing and it isn’t coppywritten by us…yet, so feel free to use it whenever. lol.

    ps I loooove your reviews, your’e just so damn funny!



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