124 Responses to “The Ann Aguirre Confessional”

1. Kimberly B. Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 8:31 am

   1 This is a really asinine confession, but I think I’ve entered just about every Grimspace contest out there (and no, that’s not my confession) so I may as well give it a shot. My confession is that I stopped reading Harry Potter at book 4, because the insane popularity of this series kind of turns me off. In fact, this is kind of a two part confession, because insane popularity in general turns me off, and this has made me avoid a lot of books, movies, and television shows I would probably enjoy (partly why I avoided “Buffy” for so long, and I’ve still never seen “Titanic”). As for Harry Potter, I will probably finish the series some day, but it’s not likely to go out of print, and I’d rather save my valuable book-reading time and money for authors who need my support, because, though equally talented, they are newer or less well-known than Rowling.

2. k Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 9:09 am

   2 I feel like my blog (nominally about sports) contains my most shameful confession, really (despite being a straight woman, I am a huge fan of Jessica Alba. I am, I think, one of two Jessica Alba fans in the world who does not want to have sex with her, including her family) but I had to comment to note: YOU ARE SO RIGHT ABOUT FRY AND LEELA. Oh, god, that last episode! THE OPERA. THEIRS IS A FOREVER LOVE. I have to resort to asscaps to say it loud enough.

3. Jill Sorenson Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 9:10 am

   3 Here’s a really lame confession: When I was about 13, I was totally obsessed with a band called The Dead Milkmen. Kimberly, I also stopped reading Harry Potter, but I think I made it to book five. I’m a slut for commercial stuff these days, give me more Buffy, please, so the reason I quit was length, not popularity. I can’t committ that much time to one book anymore. Jeez. But I’m with you about giving new authors a chance. Here, here. Or is it hear, hear? My brain is shutting down. Ann, you sound like a fun gal. I’ve heard a lot of good things about GRIMSPACE. Hope I win!

4. bam Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 9:18 am

   4 Author Comment Jill, I happen to love Dead Milkmen. Observe: - Hey Jack, what’s happenin’? - I don’t know. - Well uh, rumor around town says you might be thinkin’ ’bout goin’ down to the shore. - Uh, yeah, I think I’m gonna go down to the shore. - Whadda ya gonna do down there? - Uh, I don’t know, p-play some video games, buy some Def Leppard t-shirts. - Don’t forget your Motley Crue t-shirt; y’know all proceeds go to get their lead singer out a’ jail. - Uh huh. - Can’t wait to go down. Hey uh, were ya gonna check out the sand bar while you’re down there? - Uh, what’s the Sand Bar? - Ah, it’s a place that lets sixteen year-old kids drink. - Ah, cool. - Ya hey, guess who’s gonna be there? - Uh, who? - My favorite cover band, Crystal Ship. - Wow. - Yeah, they do a Doors show, you’d be really impressed, in fact, it goes a little like this: Love me two times baby Love me twice today Love me two times, girl Cause I got AIDS Love me two times baby, once for tomorrow, once cause I got AIDS - Uh… - Pretty good Jim Morrison impersonation there. I hope those guys have a good sense a’ humor and don’t take us into court. - Uh, what’s the court? - Never mind that, the important thing here… - You mean the People’s Court. - The… Now, that’s another story. The important thing here is that we get to the part where you ask me how I’m gonna get down to the shore. - Oh, how you gettin’ down to the shore? - Funny you should ask, I’ve got a car now… - Ah wow, how’d ya get a car? - Oh, my folks drove it up here from the Bahamas. - You’re kidding! - I must be, the Bahamas are islands. Okay, the important thing here is that, uh, you ask me what kinda car it is. - Uh uh, what kinda car do ya’ got? - I’ve got a bitchin’ Camaro…

5. Ann Aguirre Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 9:20 am

   5 Kim B, I’ve never seen Titanic either. I got put off DiCaprio when he was in his pretty boy stage. I’ve since come to like him again since he aged enough to be manly. I quite liked him in Blood Diamond and The Departed. K — I know, right?! OMG, Fry and Leela are too awesome for words. Sometimes I want to smack her, and then sometimes I totally understand why she doesn’t want to go forward. RE: last episode — you must watch Bender’s Big Score. It’s a movie they put out on DVD, and it has even more Fry / Leela goodness. Jill, thanks. I was into the Dead Milkmen too! Long time ago. Do you like the Dead Kennedys?

6. Randi Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 9:23 am

   6 OK; #1: I’m a slob. Totally and utterly messy. And I’m a girl. A girl slob. Hard to imagine, I know, but there it is. I’m almost at terms with it. #2: I don’t cook. In fact, I hate cooking. I think it’s a total waste of time. There you are, spending hours in the kitchen messing around, and 1/2 hour after you’re done, there’s nothing to show for it. That bugs me. #3: I have secret fantasies of being a submissive. Since I haven’t dated anyone in 5 years (another secret), I have no way of really confirming that suspicion, but it’s there. #4: I too, love to sleep. LOVE IT. There’s nothing better than laying around in that semi-sleep state. It’s the best. #5: I love reality TV. Well, most of it. Temptation Island doesn’t do anything for me; but I love Survivor, The Amazing Race, Project Runway, So You Think You Can Dance?, Dancing With The Stars, and What Not To Wear. #6: I don’t feel bad that I’m thin. Naturally. I can eat anything and eat all day and I don’t gain a pound. This doesn’t make me feel bad, at all. Though I will admit it’s a pain trying to find clothing that isn’t couture. Because, I don’t have thousands of dollars to spend on clothing, and most mid-price clothing doesn’t fit me. I usually have to shop in the Juniors section, but they don’t make good quality clothing for Juniors. Or suits. No suits for Juniors, either. As an addendum, I adore Kate Moss, because she became a super-model when I was in high school, and I have her body type, so it helped my self-image. A lot.

7. Bonnie Dee Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 9:29 am

   7 Well, your first couple of items made me think we’re twin sisters from different mothers. I LOVE watching TV, movies and laying around on the couch more than anything, but I keep myself busy and producing almost compulsively because I don’t want to be a total couch potato. And I used to eat peanut butter and banana slices smooshed between graham crackers. But you lost me when you said you weren’t a Whedonite, and while I adore and quote The Simpsons, I never have been able to get into Futurama. I’d love to share a secret, I really would, but I don’t have anything interesting to tell. Instead, I’ll share this link to Jimmy Kimmel’s response to Sarah Silverman’s F**cking Matt Damon video, just because it’s stinkin’ hilarious….http://youtube.com/watch?v=dZKZPYVvk3A

8. Ann Aguirre Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 9:33 am

   8 Whoa, Randi is going for that GC! Some major league confessions there. Bonnie, you’re talking crazy, woman. While the Simpsons are fun and amusing, Futurama is epic. EPIC! How can you not love a show where Lucy Liu-bots invade the city?

9. bam Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 9:35 am

   9 Author Comment I think the I’m Fucking Matt Damon video is funnier. But that’s because I’m in luuurve with Matt Damon and he was so cute in it. Oh, and here’s my confessional: I am perfectly willing to be the meat of a Christian Bale and Eric Bana sandwich. There it is. If it meant the survival of mankind and saving the world, I— Dionne Galace— will sacrifice myself for the greater good and totally do it with Christian Bale and Eric Bana… AT THE SAME TIME. And one more thing! I have crazy insane girl-crush on Meljean Brook. It is a love that dare not speaketh its name.

10. Wendy Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 9:42 am

    10 I love The Simpsons! I practically grew up watching that show. Hell, I learned English watching it! And The Futurama’s awesome too. Here’s my confessions - I’m studying to be a nurse but I don’t know if I’m compassionate enough (or um, even a little) to be able to work as one. I like to put chocolate ice cream in a piece of Cuban bread - it’s a ice cream sandwich! My dad thinks it’s disgusting, this coming from a guy who ones mixed black beans with spaghetti!

11. Ann Aguirre Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 9:45 am

    11 I agree with you, Dee. Not because I’m f****ing Matt Damon or even have a crush on him. The lyrics were catchier — the song’s success hinged on the performance of two people, not a Cecil B DeMille cast. I give Jimmy a fail; his wasn’t as clever. It looked like trying too hard.

12. bam Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 9:48 am

    12 Author Comment Not only am I Fucking Matt Damon, I also happen to have a crush on Obama.

13. Ann Aguirre Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 9:51 am

    13 “If it meant the survival of mankind and saving the world, I— Dionne Galace— will sacrifice myself for the greater good and totally do it with Christian Bale and Eric Bana… AT THE SAME TIME.” But would you do it just for fun? Remember, HFCB might be reading this.

14. bam Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 9:55 am

    14 Author Comment But would you do it just for fun? You insult my honor by even asking such a thing. You thought I would cheat on HFCB with CB and EB? Oh, you’re silly. You’re silly. I love that you’d go there. You’re silly. Good-bye. Only for the good of the world, Aguirre.

15. Ann Aguirre Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 10:00 am

    15 Wendy, I Googled Cuban bread and apparently it is made with lard instead of oil. Yum! Your ice cream sandwich sounds delish. (Not really) You’re a brave woman to confess this. I think it’s worse than peanut butter on bananas.

16. Mallika Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 10:27 am

    16 1. I’m introverted. I’m not shy, nor am I terrified of social situations — I just don’t feel the need to constantly surround myself with a gaggle of people. I’d also rather stay at home, curled up with my husband and two cats watching a movie, than go out dancing or clubbing. This was also true during my teenage years and early twenties — the call of the night was never strong for me. As the years go by I seem to become more and more of a homebody, but well … I guess it’s a good thing that my husband is kind of similar in that aspect. We’ll be hermits together! (But hey, anyone is welcome to come visit! Just give me a day’s notice so I can tidy up our home a bit!) 2. I overly worry and overly analyze things. When I have a problem, I look it at from all possible angles and think of a billion solutions — and all the things that could go wrong. My business textbooks back in university would tell us to have contingency plans set up, but I think I may have taken that a bit too much to heart — I have contingency plans for every solution, and contingency plans for the contingency plans. But hey, the day the zombies start up their revolution, you guys should come find me — I’ll have plans set up that will ensure we can survive for at least a year and be well-protected from brain-loving flesheaters to boot. 3. I’m plagued by the procrastination disease. I call it a disease because it makes me feel better and gives me hope that I can one day cure myself of it (ha). If I have 10 days to do any given project and I know that I can do it in 4, instead of finishing the project on the first 4 days and having 6 days of slacky-happy-fun times, I tend to do it the other way around: have my little slacky-happy time first, and THEN grind my way to completion. (And no, I have never missed a deadline for anything, whether school- or work-related.) 4. For the past three months I think the number of hours I’ve played video games and massively-multiplayer online games exceeds the number of hours I’ve read. *gasp* 5. This is something that makes me rather ashamed, but I’m trying to change it and be more proactive: even after living in Spain for the past couple of years, I’m still not at all fluent in Spanish because: I stopped going to Spanish class when my husband and I moved from one city to another; I do freelance work in English and Thai; and (the biggest part) my husband — who is Spanish — and I talk to each other in English, which is the language we used when we first met each other. It just feels too weird to talk to him in any other language. I hate feeling so incompetent, and I’m working to change the language thing. I would’ve thought someone who’d been in a foreign country for two years and hadn’t really grasped the language somewhat of an idiot, and I have to admit that I am now that idiot.

17. Sarai Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 11:05 am

    17 “Oh, and here’s my confessional: I am perfectly willing to be the meat of a Christian Bale and Eric Bana sandwich. There it is. If it meant the survival of mankind and saving the world, I— Dionne Galace— will sacrifice myself for the greater good and totally do it with Christian Bale and Eric Bana… AT THE SAME TIME.” OMG you totally read my mind and my secret confession I would so totally watch and not give a flying fuck about it. You go do your thing while I sit in the corner drooling and other things I need not mention here.

18. Ilona Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 11:05 am

    18 My only confession would be that I am very, VERY lazy. I would rather sit and read a book than do housework. In fact if it wasn’t for the hunger pangs I probably wouldn’t even cook!! MMmm talking of hunger pangs -think I will go and try peanut butter on bananas (wonder if it’s as tasty as fresh ground black pepper on vanilla ice-cream?)

19. azteclady Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 11:08 am

    19 These are all true, but since others have been so kind as to put themselves forward first, I’ll just use the ones that fit. Sorta. #1 Slob, for the same reasons Randi doesn’t like to cook. You dust, you mop, you pick up, you fold, you put away. Wait ten minutes, and there’s something else to clean, to pick up, to put away. Grrrr. #2 Hate cooking, so I don’t. I eat to live. Canned and microwaved stuff has kept me alive and healthy, who needs more? #3 Unless someone else cooks or brings food or takes me out. Then I live to eat. #4 I’m happier left by myself, with books, movies, and the computer, than with people and noise. When my family visits, they tend to become a bit like me–apparently there’s something in the house *grin* like a sickness… (or perhaps it’s more restful that crowds) #5 I have a serious book habit. Serious. And if there’s any chance whatsoever that I’ll reread a book, it stays. Which means that there are books on the floor, in the closets, behind the doors, under the staircase, on tables, in boxes, under the desk… Did I mention I have a book habit? #5.1 I have a DVD habit. It’s not as bad as the book habit but it ain’t a kidding matter. #5.2 I have a pet and plant habit. So far there’re three indoor cats, two large indoor dogs, a ferret, the teenaged monster, close to 50 violet plants, and a yard cluttered with plants and pots and bushes and stuff. (Apparently I owe my green thumb to my grandmother–gracias, abuelita!) #6 I have a doctorate in procrastination. *looking at the hundred and seventeen half done projects around the house* I could get a job as an instructor. I’ll think about it. #7 I have opinions about everything under the sun, and a burning need to share them–whether I really know what I’m talking about or not *grin* #8 I think I, too, have entered every single Ann Aguirre contest in the past four weeks or so. Who you be calling greedy?

20. Sweet Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 11:14 am

    20 Ann your #1 made me LOL till I snorted ( looks around , because I do that too!!!!! Its amazing how fast they pounce once you log on ) And does it make me a nerd that when you said one day your going to be like Hubert Farnsworth. I went HEY, SHE FORGOT THE J !!!!!! I too am a lover of all things Matt Groening. One of my secret shames is that I love on the Simpsons Halloween episodes how they change the names of the cast in the credits to try and make them scary. It’s sooo dorky but I love it. Also to the horror of many of my friends and family members I have never seen an episode of Supernatural !!! I know its shocking

21. Ann Aguirre Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 11:26 am

    21 Groening! Sweet, isn’t he awesome? I love the Simpsons where he has a cameoo in the show and he portrays himself as an insane squinty drunk with a gun in his office.

22. darragha Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 12:11 pm

    22 My daughter did her gymnastics routine (power move running front hand stand land in splits) to the theme from Futurama. It’s a heck of a theme. I’m all about Fry and Leela. Darragha

23. lightlyfell Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 12:22 pm

    23 1. I take better care of my guinea pigs than my kids. And I won’t let my kids eat the guinea’s lettuce. Or their carrots. Well, maybe one carrot. 2. I have a crush on Michael Keaton. Still. That scene in “Pacific Heights”, when he has Melony Griffin pinned on the floor and he’s holding a nail gun? I know that scene isn’t supposed to be hot, but wow, it is. 3. I love Survivor too, even though the show is beyond stupid. But I really watch the show to read all the message boards, which are even worse. 4. I would rather read than eat. 5. Just getting a new shower gel can make me happy for a couple of days.

24. Jill Sorenson Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 12:54 pm

    24 I can’t believe anyone else has even heard of the Dead Milkmen! Ah, Bitchin Camaro. I could recite some of the lyrics, but I’ve already embarrassed myself enough. Bam, did you decipher that bit of dialogue yourself? If I remember correctly, it was almost unintelligible! Ann, I don’t think I ever got into the Dead Kennedys. But who doesn’t love the title of that one album? Too Drunk to…well, you know. Mallika, don’t feel bad about not being fluent in Spanish. Some of us (me) are linguistically challenged. I minored in Spanish, took lots of classes, worked with/taught kids who spoke the language exclusively, and I still SUCK! Really, really bad. I can barely mumble a few words.

25. Ann Aguirre Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 1:12 pm

    25 I have a confession to make. I just got an email from my editor: For the week ending 2/24/08, GRIMSPACE is #8 on B&N’s science fiction & fantasy mass market bestseller list #36 on BGI’s (Borders group–includes Borders stores and Waldenbooks) SF&F mass market bestseller list Congratulations! So… apparently I’m a bestseller and the book’s not even officially out yet. Woohoo! Go forth tomorrow on the release and buy another copy for your BFF. She’ll thank you, I swear.

26. Jennifer Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 1:19 pm

    26 I uh, really love slutty men on television. Yes, I just started watching Torchwood.

27. danette Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 1:25 pm

    27 Ok you have me stuck on pancakes at the moment. My nephew turned 3 last week, so me and the girls went to go celebrate with him. WHen wwe got to the opening presents part,he open things and had that oh cool whateva face then he opens up one present and starts jumping upa nd down sreaming “Pancakes,Pancakes. I want Pancakes”, I look over to see the present and guess what its a box of wheat pancake mix. I cracked up laughing,seeing him get so excited over pancakes and none of his other presents. Confession time: I love to procrastinate, when it comes to homework. You would think that I’m too old for this ,but I’ll start my homework,then get distracted or bored and I’ll end up on the computer or reading a book. I thank the higher power that I took one of my classes online or I’d be way behind. Cheers for the Grimspace release! Hugs, Danette

28. azteclady Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 1:35 pm

    28 *standing ovation* Go, Ann! Go, Jax, go March!!! *ahem* /fangrrrrrl

29. JSL Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 1:47 pm

    29 These comments - oh man! Ok - my confession? Is more something that should go on post secret, really… in college, one year I couldn’t stand my roommate. She was this 200+ lb girl [she told me], about 5′3″ - always talked about how healthy she was, but ate chipotle daily and thought she was the hottest thing ever. I’d be trying to do work before heading out, and she’d tell me how every guy in public hit on her. She also thought she was black, because her ring tone was beyonce, and thought people were joking when they told her she was white. (She also wanted to be Japanese - but I think the language threw her.) She didn’t wash her sheets/bedding the entire time we were roommates, used so much hair product and spray I’d gag when I walked into the room, etc. She also visited weird annoying websites with loud, squeaky shrill voices… and all this is a build up to me ruining her laptop. I got so sick of her iming with the sounds on max and her turning her computer up over mine (when I had been listening to mine first, at a reasonable volume)… one day I poured a cup of water over it. I found out you can revive a laptop by dumping out the water and blow drying it dry… but I got so annoyed another time (she stole my underwear and gave it to some guys on our floor…) that I murdered her laptop again. For good. That’s my confession.

30. azteclady Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 1:58 pm

    30 JSL, I bow to your vindictiveness! And now I’m afraid of you *cowering in the virtual corner*

31. Ann Aguirre Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 2:00 pm

    31 Wow, ok, between JSL and Randi, I think for “best / juiciest” confession. Cuz daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaamn.

32. JSL Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 2:24 pm

    32 Randi, I hate you. Haha. My sister is the same way - when a bunch of stores resized, she’d pull on a pair of size 0 pants, stand up, and they’d fall down. She also needs long/tall clothes. My roommate (a diffferent one)was also the same - she was a stick and ate McDonalds every day. Of course, she’ll probably get a heart attack in 10 more years… Me on the other hand, I might otherwise swim in clothes, but my butt will hold anything up . Girl slobs and non cooks I think are more common- they just hide. I’m a girl slob, but I love to cook. My current roommate exists on prepackaged meals. azteclady - thanks. as soon as I posted the comment, I was like “ack- delete! delete!” obviously, that roommate and I did not get along. *she stole my underwear* and worse, gave it to the nasty loser guys. I found out because I walked back from classes on day and saw some of it taped to the mantels of doors. Very nice. So… yeah… probably not the best thing I could have done - and it would be better if I still didn’t feel guilty so many years later - but, having a conscience is good, right?!?! Ann- *blush* - I’m #8 from your list too, but I never thought mayfly- I think goldfish (there’s a story behind that one…). And I watched Buffy but never luuurved her. Saw some Angel - for the same reason as you. I however, didn’t even know he had a son, and son + Cordy = eeeww. To your #1- I’d never even heard of it, but *hilarious* - thanks for sharing! [And this is the post I should have made pre-confession…]

33. Tez Miller Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 5:14 pm

    33 Glad to learn I’m not the only person who isn’t a Joss Whedon fangirly. Seth MacFarlane, on the other hand… Have a lovely day!

34. Josie Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 5:50 pm

    34 Congratulations Ann!! What fabulous news. LOL over the Simpsons quote - that’s one of my faves… I also have a lot of love for Family Guy - that show is so deliciously wrong and as for Futurama - my confession is that Dr Zoidberg is actually my fave character. “Stop! Stop! If you interrupt the mating dance the male will become enraged and maul us with his fearsome gonad!” Dr Zoidberg

35. Ann Aguirre Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 5:57 pm

    35 Josie… have you seen the one where Mom makes the robots rebel? The Professor has to get to second base with her to save the world, and he shows up at her cabin in the woods. She’s not pleased to see him, so she starts slamming his foot in the door, trying to make him go away. Zoidberg says, “Is this human mating? I like it!”

36. Shiloh Walker Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 6:40 pm

    36 I’ve been known to tear up over those goofy ‘kleenex’ commercials.

37. Jambrea Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 7:10 pm

    37 I love all the confessions. I can’t think of one. At least not one that could top some of the ones here. This post made me laugh out loud.

38. Wendy Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 7:16 pm

    38 Lard?.. LARD?! Oh, yuck. Thanks, Ann! I would have prefer to live in ignorance of that little fact, lol.

39. Ann Aguirre Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 7:19 pm

    39 Oh man, Shiloh… I went to the movies over the weekend and there was a trailer for PS I Love you. I almost started bawling; I mean, it was a near thing. I’m not sure I could sit through that movie without a box of tissues. (It’s not out yet here.) Feel free to be tongue in cheek, Jambrea. (I’m not actually embarrassed about loving cartoons.) Hehe, Wendy! Sowwy.

40. Pamk Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 7:47 pm

    40 I think your sense of humour rocks. I used to have conversations like that with folks that tried to im me. hehe. I love cartoons too and buffy didn’t do it for me either. I always tended to go for the bad boy. Thus spike was the better choice for me. seems to me if your a vamp you just need to make the best of the situation and quit whining about it.

41. Josie Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 7:52 pm

    41 Ann said: Josie… have you seen the one where Mom makes the robots rebel? The Professor has to get to second base with her to save the world, and he shows up at her cabin in the woods. She’s not pleased to see him, so she starts slamming his foot in the door, trying to make him go away. Yep! I love Mom… That episode is a hoot. I think my all time fave is the ep where Zoidberg falls in love with Edna - this conversation just cracks me up… “Fry: Start with a compliment. Tell her she looks thin. Dr. Zoidberg: [calling to Edna] You seem malnourished. Are you suffering from internal parasites?” Zoidberg and Fry later end up in a fight to the death. Classic.

42. Ann Aguirre Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 8:00 pm

    42 Oh, I love that one, Josie! The twist about what happens to Zoidberg’s people when they have sex is pretty unexpected, really. Do you think we should start voting on the best confession? There will be a random winner drawn too, but I’m gonna cast my vote for… RANDI. She put it out there, man! I gotta respect that.

43. Michele Lee Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 8:07 pm

    43 So right about Fry and Leelah. I would snatch Fry up in heartbeat if he’d give me that attention Oh goodness, a confession now, eh? Let’s see, I didn’t like Firefly. I don’t watch BSG. My favorite SF is probably Star Trek: The Next Generation. The episode where Data creates a daughter makes me cry every time. I like SF movies most people seem to have hated. Pitch Black, Ultraviolet, Aeon Flux. I loved all of those, especially Aeon Flux.

44. Josie Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 8:29 pm

    44 But what a way to go Ann! I’ll vote for JSL’s confession… A person can only be pushed so far!

45. bam Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 11:27 pm

    45 Author Comment Bam, did you decipher that bit of dialogue yourself? If I remember correctly, it was almost unintelligible! Jill, I am well-versed and quite fluent in stoner-speak. But when the song first came out, I think I listened to it five hundred times until I had it memorized.

46. danette Posted: Feb 25th, 2008 at 11:41 pm

    46 JSL had me thinking about figures. My sister is a size 2. I was happy and a smidge jealous when after she had her baby,she was a size smaller in the pants but her chichi’s are bigger than mine now.HUH?

47. katiebabs Posted: Feb 26th, 2008 at 5:11 am

    47 I am a cartoon addict! I could watch Spongebob and Family Guy all day long. :)

48. Ann Aguirre Posted: Feb 26th, 2008 at 5:25 am

    48 Dee, would you mind editing the post to show we’re voting between Randi and JSL now? I love that people are still confessing stuff, but we need to move this along to the next level. A winner must be named! They can keep confessing stuff as well, and if it’s something super-juicy, we can add them to the ballot.

49. lisabea Posted: Feb 26th, 2008 at 6:12 am

    49 I have a confession as well: I still haven’t read this gd book. I’ve been reading too much man love. Sigh. I think if I didn’t have one, I would forget what a vagina is….. Ann: word to the pb and banana. That IS good eatin. Big Bang Theory is my fav. show, too (we could so be bffs) AND best cartoon (other than spaceghost, of course) is Lucy Daughter of the Devil.

50. Jambrea Posted: Feb 26th, 2008 at 7:35 am

    50 My vote goes to JSL!!

51. Randi Posted: Feb 26th, 2008 at 8:47 am

    51 Azteclady: Let’s talk about that book habit. Mine is out of control. I just recently built a bookshelf in my bedroom and already it’s full. I’m back to having books in stacks all around the house again…*sigh* Damn all these great authors who keep writing books. Fie, Fie on you all! Jennifer: OMG, LOVE Torchwood. It’s so spicy. And there’s lots of m/m, f/f sexxoring. Did you see the episode with James Marston? He’s wayyyyy hotter without the bleachy blond hair. Danette: hahahaah. Pancakes. While I was reading that I remembered that scene in Cabin Fever when the little kid runs and screams, “Pancakes! Paaaancaaaake!” I still have no idea what the writer was trying to get across but it always cracks me up. JSL: Wow! Color me impressed and awed by your powers of revenge. I don’t know if you should be ashamed, clearly that woman pushed you beyond your powers of control. Plus, it’s a damn good story. And if it makes you feel better, I have no T&A. Unless I go on the pill, then I’ve got teh hot T&A.

52. azteclady Posted: Feb 26th, 2008 at 8:50 am

    52 I can’t choose!!! Randi showed the way, but JSL is scary as hell! Can I vote once for each? *grin*

53. Samantha Posted: Feb 26th, 2008 at 8:54 am

    53 Fry and Leela - FOREVER!!! That’s all I have to say .

54. Ann Aguirre Posted: Feb 26th, 2008 at 9:18 am

    54 Samantha, remember when he made her fall in love with her by writing her name in the stars?

55. Christine Posted: Feb 26th, 2008 at 9:39 am

    55 I’m a major crier, too. Movies, books, songs, TV shows-even kids shows. Seriously… I think I even cried watching “That’s So Raven” one time. *hangs head in shame* I finally stopped crying when I see roadkill, though. I’ve been buying only nutritious romaine, green leaf, red leaf or mesclun lettuces for the last fifteen years. And last week…. I bought ICEBERG LETTUCE! It was very liberating. lol Anyway, I vote for JSL. That’s one mighty impressive confession.

56. JSL Posted: Feb 26th, 2008 at 9:40 am

    56 All these comments are making me miss Futerama more and more - a friend just bought the show on DVD - maybe I’ll have to hint at a get together . I love Family Guy and American Dad - both sometimes have me pausing and thinking “did they just *say* that?” I loved the American Dad episode where Roger and Francine did Who’s Afraid of Virginia Wolfe. Randi - I don’t have the size, but I do have the figure. My mom weighed 97 lbs @ age 27. There are always commercials about “natural supplements to enhance your bust” and I tease my sister and tell her I’m going to take it. (Every time we go shopping she tells me at least once I should consider breast reduction surgery.) I have to wear clothes sizes too large b/c of t&A - so “when I grow up” I’m going to have to get all my clothes tailored. Dannette - ain’t life just not fair? If only all weight gain went only where you wanted it to. Pregnancy does funky things.

57. bam Posted: Feb 26th, 2008 at 9:46 am

    57 Author Comment here’s my confessional. And it’s a REAL one. I know we’ve already picked out the finalists and it’s not like I can win anyway ’cause… uh, I’m the blog owner. Anyway, I’m in a sharing mood. Here it is: I love porn. Not just love it, but luuuuuuuurve it. I have, like, 80 gigs of it, no joke. It’s separated into categories. Just like Fox Mulder who watches porn in the background because it helped him think, so do I. I just always have porn playing on my computer, no matter what I’m doing. It’s like my comfort blanket. But… um… okay. Uh. Wow, that was cathartic.

58. azteclady Posted: Feb 26th, 2008 at 9:47 am

    58 Shit. Bam needs to win now *fascinated*

59. fiveandfour Posted: Feb 26th, 2008 at 9:50 am

    59 I was working up to my confession (I have a couple “I can’t believe I did that” incidents), but now I don’t have to. Whew! My vote goes to JSL for her powers of revenge - awesome! But Ann, I just *had* to say that you stopped watching Angel at the wrong time…that entire season is, hands down, my favorite from both Buffy and Angel combined. But you have to see the whole season - it goes off in ways that seem like complete Whiskey Tango Foxtrot at the time, but it all comes together at the end. I LOVE stories like that: movies like The Nines and books like One Hundred Years of Solitude with the big pay off at the end. (And I miss Pinky and the Brain - we had to rent a DVD recently to get a fix; such a great cartoon.)

60. Ann Aguirre Posted: Feb 26th, 2008 at 9:54 am

    60 Damn. That’s a big one. But no, she cannot win. Still, I cannot help but wonder… what’s your favorite kind, dude? F/F, M/M? F/F/M, M/F/M, or so many letters you can’t see who’s doing what to whom and it looks like a crazy oily naked game of Twister? PS — Maybe I’ll get the Angel DVDs, Fiveandfour.

61. bam Posted: Feb 26th, 2008 at 10:01 am

    61 Author Comment Oddly enough, I like Asian porn. Scratch that, Japanese porn. Hentai. With tentacles. Also, group sex, where you can’t even tell what’s going on ’cause there are so many arms and legs. Awesome. And the school girls with the high breathy voices whom the video disclaimer ASSURES me are over 18 years old? Yum. I think it stems from the fact that when I was a kid, I found my grampa’s big ole stash of porn comics and used to sneak into his room so I could read them, but one day, my mom caught me, burned them, and made me go into confession. I was traumatized. MY PORN! I think that might also be why I became a pack rat. But yeah— uh. I need a drink.

62. heather (errantdreams) Posted: Feb 26th, 2008 at 10:15 am

    62 Pinky & the Brain! Whooo! ‘Grimspace’ is definitely on my wishlist. Of course, that wishlist is so long that who knows when I’ll get to it. =/ Which is my confession: I’m a book-slut. I have seven full pages of books and DVDs on my Amazon wish-list (mostly books), and I don’t often end up ordering them because most of the books I read these days are review copies. I was so grateful when my husband got me a box of books from my wishlist for Valentine’s Day!

63. Teresa W. Posted: Feb 26th, 2008 at 11:47 am

    63 I am so looking forward to Grimspace! My confession is that I spend about 3 to 4 hours a day blog hopping. I’m always looking for new authors and releases! I’m a book junkie.

64. Randi Posted: Feb 26th, 2008 at 12:32 pm

    64 Wow, Bam, that’s a fabulous confession! As it happens, I like me some porn too. Though I’m more of a vanilla porn girl.

65. SweetNSourGirl Posted: Feb 26th, 2008 at 1:59 pm

    65 Heehee laughing hysterically from this! I don’t think I can top any of your confessions, so I’m not going to even try.

66. Christine Posted: Feb 26th, 2008 at 2:08 pm

    66 I think BAM needs a drink and then maybe a cigarette. …. and I thought last night’s iceberg lettuce was juicy. LOL

67. JSL Posted: Feb 26th, 2008 at 2:12 pm

    67 bam - your last comment made me laugh. Also, when I’d read the first part - I thought - “Japanese porn? Does that include anime porn?” So I guess that somewhat answers my question. (I didn’t get to read the second half earlier). A porn pack rat - what a title.

68. Samantha Posted: Feb 26th, 2008 at 2:35 pm

    68 Ann: Samantha, remember when he made her fall in love with her by writing her name in the stars? Oh, yes- sniff -so sweet. I love porn, too. French porn is hot! German porn makes me laugh: Oh! Das ist gut!

69. Randi Posted: Feb 26th, 2008 at 3:04 pm

    69 Bam: OK, I have to admit some ignorance in this area…what is Hantai porn? and Samantha: What makes French porn hot? Is there something different about French porn than US porn? I had no idea…I suddenly feel very virginal. *shuffles around*

70. Ann Aguirre Posted: Feb 26th, 2008 at 3:43 pm

    70 Dude. Hentai is wrong. I watched this movie, Urotsukidoji, which was all manner of fucked up. School girls getting rogered with monster tentacles! Supposedly this came about because it was illegal in Japan to depict human genitalia. So they went around this rule by inventing monster tentacle sex, ie the tentacle isn’t a penis ergo it’s okay to stick it into womenfolk in cartoons!

71. JSL Posted: Feb 26th, 2008 at 4:05 pm

    71 Randi - hentai is Japanese (the word). The actual Japanese has a strong negative connotation. Here in the US, it just basically means porn. There’s anime and comics etc - and if it’s hentai, that generally means whatever it is is NC-17. - Can you tell I was still in (little kid) school when anime hit the states? I’m sure there’s a wiki article on it. bam - (does hentai refer exclusively to anime?) & isn’t it they do the tentacle sex because it’s illegal to show girlie bits and manly bits in Japan? (believe it or not… this has been lunch table conversation. oh the things you learn in professional school.)

72. Lorelie Posted: Feb 26th, 2008 at 4:12 pm

    72 Randi: I dare you to go google it. >:) Bam: I have teh lurve for Penthouse Variations for a very similar reason. Minus the traumatizing mother discovery. Vote: JSL because while Randi really threw it out there, JSL’s might involve criminal prosecution if read by the wrong person. And that takes balls. Sadness: Something about this site in the past day or so has tripped the “Mature Content” warning at my work. (Gee I wonder why.) Which means I can no longer visit during work. Must find another way to waste time.

73. azteclady Posted: Feb 27th, 2008 at 7:17 am

    73 Lorelie swayed me. My vote goes to JSL too.

74. Ann Aguirre Posted: Feb 27th, 2008 at 7:31 am

    74 Hm, sounds like JSL is in the lead. Should we call her the winner?

75. bam Posted: Feb 27th, 2008 at 7:57 am

    75 Author Comment I’m sure folks have googled it by now, but Hentai: is a Japanese word that can be used to mean “metamorphosis” or “abnormality”. In Japan “hentai” has a strong negative connotation, and is commonly used to mean “sexually perverted”. In the West the term is used as slang for sexually explicit or pornographic comics and animation, particularly Japanese anime, manga and computer games (see Japanese pornography). In Japan sexually explicit material is more often referred to as “jū hachi kin” (18禁; prohibited for sale to persons under 18), “ecchi/Hentai anime” (sexual/pornographic anime), “seinen” (成年; adult, not to be confused with 青年 young adult), or with the prefix “ero-”. Hentai anime and manga allow elements of sexual fantasy to be represented in ways that would be impossible to film. This may include portrayals of sexual acts which are physically impossible, unacceptable in society, or run counter to social norms. Examples include extreme bondage, creatures with tentacles, and other fetishes. Shunga artists like Yoshitoshi and Kuniyoshi showed gang rape, erotic crucifixion, and even forced late third-trimester abortions by a “cannibal witch.”

76. Samantha Posted: Feb 27th, 2008 at 8:09 am

    76 Randi: and Samantha: What makes French porn hot? Is there something different about French porn than US porn? I had no idea…I suddenly feel very virginal. *shuffles around* It was just so… erotic and sexy. Eroticism mixed with, ya know, the hardcore f**king you know and love from run of the mill porn is kind of heady. Mmmm, it’s fun to blush at work .

77. Ann Aguirre Posted: Feb 27th, 2008 at 8:58 am

    77 Winners are announced at the top: JSL = gift certificate Mallika = signed copy of GRIMSPACE Please feel free to continue talking ’bout all manners of porn.

78. Jambrea Posted: Feb 27th, 2008 at 10:12 am

    78 Congrats to JSL & Mallika!!!

79. Mallika Posted: Feb 27th, 2008 at 10:29 am

    79 Whoa, thanks!

80. Ann Aguirre Posted: Feb 27th, 2008 at 10:31 am

    80 I forgot to confess this — if I’m gonna watch porn, I’d just as soon see lesbians, really pretty ones.

81. Randi Posted: Feb 27th, 2008 at 1:11 pm

    81 Congrats to JSL and Mallika! No hard feelings, but only because talking about porn totally made me forget what I was trying to win.

82. heather (errantdreams) Posted: Feb 27th, 2008 at 1:15 pm

    82 Grats you two! You certainly earned it.

83. Ann Aguirre Posted: Feb 27th, 2008 at 1:21 pm

    83 Randi, talking about pr0n would distract anyone.

84. Gwen Posted: Feb 27th, 2008 at 4:01 pm

    84 Thanks all for a very entertaining read! That’s the best comment string I’ve read in AGES! Save it for posterity, Bam!

85. JSL Posted: Feb 27th, 2008 at 4:30 pm

    85 Or delete it please! Haha or at least my first comment… :X

86. Ann Aguirre Posted: Feb 27th, 2008 at 4:39 pm

    86 Holy crap. It’d be a shame to stop here. 100th poster gets a signed copy of GRIMSPACE. I’ll give away another one.

87. azteclady Posted: Feb 27th, 2008 at 4:44 pm

    87 Delete it? No way! JSL, you won with that comment, you lucky one you! (I’ll stop now ’cause I already have an ARC–did I mention this book rocks? It’s good, y’all!)

88. JSL Posted: Feb 27th, 2008 at 5:03 pm

    88 azteclady - no really, I wouldn’t mind. deleting is good… and I’m with you. stopping as well b/c I’ve got an ARC. (I’d actually been avoiding posting at so many places b/c I didn’t want to take the book from anyone). Ann, you are *every where* Good luck everyone, and congratulations to the 100th comment in advance!

89. Ann Aguirre Posted: Feb 27th, 2008 at 5:09 pm

    89 Yep. I am like the freakin’ Visa card, baby, — everywhere you wanna be. Because in Bangladesh, they have got some really cool shit, and they don’t take American Express.

90. Wendy Posted: Feb 28th, 2008 at 7:44 am

    90 Congrats JSL and Mallika! So about the porn - Anyone likes guy-on-guy? Am I the only one who thinks that’s icky? I’m no prude but the whole guy thing doesn’t work for me. But here’s the weird part, girl-on-girl is hotter than guy-on-guy, to me. TMI? lol.

91. Ann Aguirre Posted: Feb 28th, 2008 at 9:34 am

    91 I actually agree with you, Wendy, at least in terms of what’s hotter. See, when I see women together, it seems like I have a shot at getting in on that. If I see two dudes together, it’s like, ok, good for them, but there’s really nothing in it for me.

92. bam Posted: Feb 28th, 2008 at 9:37 am

    92 Author Comment A shrink would tell me I have penis-envy, but damn, I do so like seeing penises in my porn. And I LIKE GIRLS that way. Hmm… if I do have penis-envy, I wonder if that’s why I enjoy tentacle porn so much.

93. Wendy Posted: Feb 28th, 2008 at 9:59 am

    93 Ann, exactly! there’s no chance with the dudes, and you’d probably get that horrible feeling of being the third wheel multiply by 1349028420. Bam, you mean THAT way? No way! And tentacle porn? Are you SERIOUS? you freak, lol.

94. Astres Posted: Feb 28th, 2008 at 10:07 am

    94 Oooo! I love bananas with peanut butter…but I tend to prefer apples. And why are we talking about tentacle porn!? O.o!!!

95. azteclady Posted: Feb 28th, 2008 at 10:19 am

    95 Funny… f/f porn squicks me, m/m hmmmm YUMMY!!!

96. Astres Posted: Feb 28th, 2008 at 10:20 am

    96 Okay, well, I like girl on girl porn but that MIGHT be because I’m, well, a lesbian O.o!

97. Mark Henry Posted: Feb 28th, 2008 at 10:30 am

    97 I hate to break up all the lesbian love during porno days. But can I just say… Comment WAR! Hi Ann

98. Astres Posted: Feb 28th, 2008 at 10:33 am

    98 Hi me!

99. Astres Posted: Feb 28th, 2008 at 10:33 am

    99 Or, umm, me again? I really want an apple now…

100. Astres Posted: Feb 28th, 2008 at 10:34 am

     100 Or me once again. Sorry to break up all the fun!

101. Mark Henry Posted: Feb 28th, 2008 at 10:36 am

     101 That’s it. I give up Ann is a goddess of bloggery. I shall hang my head in shame all the way to the store and buy Grimspace. *shuffles off*

102. Astres Posted: Feb 28th, 2008 at 11:01 am

     102 *hugs* I’s sorry!!!

103. Ann Aguirre Posted: Feb 28th, 2008 at 11:21 am

     103 Astres wins! I need you to email your mailing address. I’m making a post office run tomorrow to mail out all this loot. Hm, I didn’t realize we were at war. I just figured I’d give away another book if we got to 100. I’ve been running around all afternoon… 20 minutes in line to get gas. Sucks. PS — there’s a lesbian character in Grimspace. She gets hooked up in book two. Dina is also a serious girl-pimp. She gets more ass than a toilet seat. Just sayin’.

104. Mark Henry Posted: Feb 28th, 2008 at 11:29 am

     104 Ann - We aren’t. I iz riter bein dramactical. *grins*

105. azteclady Posted: Feb 28th, 2008 at 11:30 am

     105 Holy crap!!! Ann, you DIDN’T SAY THAT!!!! *bouncing* you didn’t say that, you ebol ebol woman!!! *covering eyes* don’t spoil me don’t spoil me don’t spoil me!!! :p

106. Mark Henry Posted: Feb 28th, 2008 at 11:30 am

     106 By the way, I was at the Seattle B&N yesterday talking to the manager and she asked for suggestions for Sci-fi/fantasy handsells. Guess who I mentioned–I mean besides me?

107. Ann Aguirre Posted: Feb 28th, 2008 at 11:35 am

     107 Oh, I didn’t spoil you. Dina hooks up in book one too, doesn’t she? But is it THE ONE in Wanderlust, not just one of her flings? I guess you’ll have to read it to find out. Mwahahahaha! Ah, ok. Riterly drama, check. Who you recommended… uhm. Anton Strout? *grins* He seems like a stand-up guy.

108. Mark Henry Posted: Feb 28th, 2008 at 11:47 am

     108 Anton already has a cheerleader at that store. Plus your dump is right next to the cafe which is awesome and probably nearly empty at this point. Who were my recs: besides you. Liz Williams (the Detective Inspector Chen series). Mark Del Franco. S.M. Peters (Whitechapel Gods). Can’t remember who else. Though I think we discussed The Glass Books of the Dream Eaters (can’t remember the author).

109. Ann Aguirre Posted: Feb 28th, 2008 at 11:55 am

     109 You know, I really want to read the Inspector Chen series. Ever since I got a taste of John Burdett, I’ve been looking for something tasty and different. She’s at the top of my list of new authors to check out. I’m also very curious about Whitechapel Gods. I hear great things about your book as well.

110. Astres Posted: Feb 28th, 2008 at 11:57 am

     110 Shoot, umm, I need your e-mail written out. The link doesn’t work for me.

111. Ann Aguirre Posted: Feb 28th, 2008 at 11:59 am

     111 ann.aguirre at gmail dot com Hope that helps! I’m mailing a job lot of prizes tomorrow.

112. Mark Henry Posted: Feb 28th, 2008 at 12:06 pm

     112 John Burdett. Bangkok 8? I’ve got that book upstairs and have yet to open it. If you’re liking the South-east asian mysteries, try Colin Cotterill. Good stuff set in communist Laos.

113. Ann Aguirre Posted: Feb 28th, 2008 at 12:13 pm

     113 Yes, Bangkok 8. I read Bangkok Tattoo as well. I haven’t finished Bangkok Haunts, but it’s floating around here somewhere. I’ll have to check out Colin Cotterill. What’s the first book called, if it’s a series. Thanks for the rec! I’d also like to try Jasper Fforde some day. Right now, my TBR is two feet tall and toppling. I did a lot of impulse buying in San Diego when I was there last, and now I’m like, WTF did I think I wanted a reference book on Edwardian beekeeping for?

114. Mark Henry Posted: Feb 28th, 2008 at 12:21 pm

     114 The Coroner’s Lunch is the first one, there’s like five I think. Jasper Fforde is THE AWESOME. Love Thursday Next. I’ve heard good things about his other series as well. One of my reviewers called me the Jasper Fforde of urban fantasy. I was ecstatic, but then I thought, isn’t Jasper Fforde the Jasper Fforde of urban fantasy? I’ll take what I can get, though. Hee heeee! I try not to look at my TBR pile for fear of an aneurysm. Good luck with the book. Mark

115. Wendy Posted: Feb 28th, 2008 at 1:09 pm

     115 “Oh, I didn’t spoil you. Dina hooks up in book one too, doesn’t she?” Yeah! “But is it THE ONE in Wanderlust, not just one of her flings? I guess you’ll have to read it to find out. Mwahahahaha!” You evil, evil woman!

116. Lorelie Posted: Feb 28th, 2008 at 4:28 pm

     116 Wait just a minute. . . I need to get this train back on track. PrOn. I like it all. And preferably, all at once. Carry on.

117. bam Posted: Feb 28th, 2008 at 11:38 pm

     117 Author Comment Dear Ann Aguirre, You’re my hero. I love you. Love, Bam. 117! YES! Pr0n!

118. danette Posted: Feb 29th, 2008 at 12:19 am

     118 Ann, Grimspace finally came in across the ocean. I got my copy .YEAH! (I swear they literally mean it’s been SHIPPED when books come to HI) Hugs, Danette

119. Ann Aguirre Posted: Feb 29th, 2008 at 4:07 am

     119 Dee… Did you ever know that you’re my hero…? You’re everything I would like to be… Cuz I can fly higher than an eagle… You are the wind beneath my wings. Apparently Grimspace was the #5 bestselling SF title on Bookscan last week. I don’t know exactly what that means, but I think it’s good. Thanks, Danette! I really hope you like it. And I’m glad HI finally got some copies. I’m sure with all that beautiful weather and those enchanting beaches, you can really use a good book to take your mind off your idyllic life.

120. Pamk Posted: Mar 1st, 2008 at 8:28 am

     120 shameful secrets huh.