Sibling Rivalry… From Hell!

28 Mar

Hmm… there are two possible plots for this book: 1) a rich man needs a nanny for his children and asks the pure, innocent, and childless sister of his Bitch!Skank!Whore! dead wife to help him out… and falls in love with her 2) a single mother working as a waitress in a restaurant meets a mysterious, handsome stranger who is secretly a billionaire taking a “vacation” from his real life and they fall in love and break up when she finds out HE LIED! about who he really is even though him being a billionaire means they can ship off her demonic kids to a boarding school in Siberia.

But wouldn’t it be awesome if the plot was actually this: Little Tommy is the troublemaker of the family, while little Tiffany is “Mommy’s Little Angel.” All Tommy wants is a little attention— Mommy’s always dressing up Tiffany in frilly little pink dresses, taking her to the doctor for her asthma, combing her hair and reading her Barbie stories at bedtime… while Tommy? Tommy gets told to clean his room and to please stop playing with matches and could he please stop trying to shave Mittens with Mommy’s favorite razor. Things were much better when Daddy was around. Daddy used to take him out to the woods and show him how to shoot squirrels with a pellet gun. And throw tree branches in the path of an oncoming skateboarder. Daddy was cool. At least until Mommy caught Daddy with their babysitter and chased him out of the house with a big knife.

And Mommy has less time for him now, especially since this big guy in a suit and a Ferrari started sniffing around her. Tiffany thinks he could be the New Daddy. Which would be cool… he’s tired of having only girls in the house. Of course that would mean he would have to share Mommy with another person. But if he got rid of Tiffany and the New Daddy, Tommy would get all the love and attention… and Mommy would love only him.

Thanks to my friend Sam for this deliciously evil cover.

Last 5 posts by bam

9 Responses to “Sibling Rivalry… From Hell!”

  1. SweetNSourGirl March 28, 2008 at 5:13 pm #

    Laughing hysterically over here! Damn, you could almost swear those children hatched out of some demon egg. Their eyes are so evil!

  2. katieM March 28, 2008 at 7:35 pm #

    She chants her evil spell while her brother watches with malicious glee. There it is – the swarm of evil blue come to do her wretched bidding. She smiles so sweetly as she sends her minions to Sally’s house. Sally won’t laugh at the brown turd hat anymore. Bwahahahaha!

  3. Devon March 29, 2008 at 5:44 am #

    He looks like he’s about to pull out a butcher knife! “That’s for playing with my Transformers!”

  4. limecello March 29, 2008 at 8:45 am #

    That cover is hella creepy. If that’s a real picture, I’m well and truly disturbed.

  5. Samantha March 29, 2008 at 10:21 am #

    I swear, the first time I saw this I thought they looked like evil robots. Sweaty, brain-hungry robots. Creepy.

  6. Amie Stuart March 29, 2008 at 10:38 am #

    Where are they now? Little Tiffy’s a 2.00 hooker and Tommy’s her pimp.

  7. Carolyn Jean March 29, 2008 at 11:25 am #

    Wait, is this a real cover on a real book? I would read it if it was that billionaire one.

  8. Shannon March 30, 2008 at 8:46 am #

    Dude, evil eyes. If that boy was one of my students… referal to the councelor. Stat! Creepy child!

  9. December Quinn/Stacia Kane March 31, 2008 at 2:25 am #

    *nods* I like your plot. I think it’s the right one.

    Does “The Daddy Club” bother anyone else as a series name? It reeks of creepy.