Bam:

Ghosts, magic and shapeshifters, oh my! If I keep repeating that phrase will I get through the books in time? First: that might have been the biggest box of books EVAR. Are you trying to make me go blind? Second: I am in the middle of busy season, but feel REALLY bad about not reviewing more often. Third: I am employing the lightning review technique used for the last box. Since there were so many books, I’d like to make sure I get through as many of them as possible, so everyone can share the love! Here we go again with Shuzluva’s Superfast Box Review!

Book: Heart Fate
Author: Robin D. Owens
Grade: D+

In Brief. The story of Tinne Holly and Lahsin Burdock is the 7th book in the HeartMates series by Ms. Owens. Clearly, I’m well behind the curve here since I haven’t read any of the previous books in the series. Lahsin is on the run from her husband as her powers are beginning to appear. She seeks shelter in a hidden corner of Druida City that can only be found by those truly in need. Tinne has just been forced to divorce his wife Genista and seeks refuge in the same hidden spot. Tinne knows that Lahsin is his HeartMate but can’t tell her for some reason that I wasn’t quite clear about, and I’m not spoiling anything here, because there is a list of characters and their relationships prior to the first page of the story.

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Let me start on a positive note: although I didn’t like this book, there were things I liked about Ms Tenorio’s writing. There is an energy to her prose that is appealing, and she is funny (always helpful when you write romantic comedies). However, for me, this book just didn’t work: the story was weak and I didn’t believe in the two main characters.

The Plot

Travis and Vetta are research scientists who have known each other since college. They are ‘best enemies’. You know the kind: they bicker and fight all the time but there’s a strong underlying friendship. They share lab space and have neighbouring apartments. Vetta is researching whether men are driven by sex or money and Travis is researching the effect of hormones on ovarian cancer.

Vetta comes from a phenomenally wealthy family. Her father owns a huge pharmaceutical company and her mother is a Swedish actress and all-round sexpot. Vetta lives with her ‘nanny’, Jade, a manipulative mother-hen. Travis, by contrast, comes from an ordinary background and has recently run out of research money.

At the start of the book, we learn that Vetta is gathering questionnaires from potential subjects. To annoy her, Travis submits one with snarky answers and obscene cartoons. We learn that Vetta intends to select a candidate from the questionnaire respondents and offer him a million dollars if he will agree to have no sex for a year. The candidate in question will have to give regular sperm samples and keep a diary.

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Grade: D+

My TBR pile is not in fact one single pile but lots of little piles. Amongst others, I have an “immediate TBR” pile of books I’m dying to read, a “worthy TBR” pile of books I feel I should read and “suck-it-and-see TBR” pile of books I’ve picked up without knowing who the author is just to see what they’re like. Manhandling, by Karen Anders was in my suck-it-and-see pile. I obviously bought it (oooh - two years ago!) cos it was a ’special price’ book but have never gotten round to reading it. Till now.

The Cover

….is dark. Not atmospheric-dark. Not deep-and-angsty dark. Just so fucking dark that I can’t actually make anything out except the weird green streak in the female model’s hair.

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Grade: D

Jane at Dear Author did a post recently ‘coming out’ as a lover of category romance. It was one of those posts that hit a nerve, generating a lot of comments. Readers were falling over themselves (myself included) to ‘fess up and wax lyrical over their favourite authors.

I’ve got about 20 Harlequins on my Keeper Shelf. Most of these are great books but a few are the equivalent emotional porn. Cheap thrills with no troublesome character development to hold up the action. Give me immediate angst, an alpha hero acting like a cockhead and a huge grovelling apology at the end and I’m in heaven.

An author who does this well is Julia James. In the past, I’ve liked her books, but her latest offering, Bedded, or Wedded? is disappointing to say the least.

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[Reviews by Annie Dean]

Dear John

Grade: C-

Dane Harley was poor white trash wrapped in Goth girl giftwrap. John Stratton lived in a big Victorian house on the hill. In their misspent youth, they ran wild together. Ten years ago, she left him in the lurch because of some crazy shit John’s daddy said about her ruining John’s future. Okay, so maybe I can buy she would be that simpleminded as a teenager. At 17, I bought into some pretty dramatic shit. So she takes off and cuts ties to her hometown of Chatham Village.

Now she’s back for the high school reunion and she hasn’t seen her best friend Roxy in all those years. They haven’t spoken either. Instead of calling her a thoughtless bitch and slamming the door on her, Roxy invites Dane in for some heavy drinking and girl bonding. They relive old times and go through the yearbook together. Read an old love letter John sent Dane. Of course they decide Dane should look John up and make amends for…yep, you guessed it. Writing him a ‘dear John’ letter.

Ms. Kent’s writing style in this story doesn’t rock my world, but it doesn’t annoy me either, although it occasionally veers toward the purple. On page 23, the heroine “practically screamed at him” and then at the bottom “she screamed at him, trembling with self-hatred”. That’s a little florid for my tastes.

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